Can't Look Back
by MadnessJones
Summary: TF Prime: When the Autobots find a survivor on board a Decepticon prison ship, Bulkhead is forced to confront his pre-war past in the form of his ex-bondmate. Now he has to face his past as well as figure out if they still have a future. AU fic. Bulkhead/OC
1. Buried Memories

_Author's Notes: Hi, all! Well, I asked my readers to vote between a TFP romance fic and a G1 romance fic. The winner was TFP (but seriously, who's surprised at this point?). This is a fic I've been excited to work on for quite some time! I fear the first chapter isn't all that great, but it's just a prologue. The story proper will commence after this. This chapter is just to get the events rolling. I hope this fic goes well, and that you review, favorite, and follow to see more of this story. Anyway, enough rambling. Time to dive into Can't Look Back :)_

* * *

Chapter 1

Buried Memories

 **The Present**

The ground bridge appeared on a small uninhabited island and deposited the Autobots, who had come to investigate a faint distress signal. They figured out the signal came from a derelict ship and had been activated after an earthquake shook the island where the ship had crashed several hundred thousand years ago.

Optimus Prime led the group of three Autobots, Arcee, Bumblebee, and Bulkhead, as well as the group of three humans Jack, Miko, and Rafael. They had allowed the kids to come along this time because the vessel was devoid of life and therefore the threat was minimal. They only hoped the Decepticons didn't find this ship before they were done investigating.

It took only a few minutes to find the ship, mostly buried with only the rear thrusters sticking out. Bulkhead pounded on the metal until it crumbled away and allowed the group to enter the rest of the ship. They entered the opening, but Arcee stopped short.

"Optimus," Arcee called to her leader, "Look at this sigil."

"A Decepticon ship," Optimus confirmed when he saw the purple wing-like symbol of their enemies.

The team walked slowly through the pitch black halls; their only illumination from their headlights and the kids' flashlights. Rusting corpses of fallen Decepticon soldiers littered the hallways. After reading the signs on the walls for several minutes, they gathered that this ship had once been a prison transport. It was a grim find, because it was most likely that there were no survivors, and Autobots had likely died on this vessel as prisoners of war.

Bumblebee bleeped and gestured to a door on their right indicating he found something.

"What is it, Bee?" Raf asked.

Bumblebee indicated that there was still a room that had faint traces of power left, and a store of energon. That was good news. They might not be able to rescue these poor deceased Cybertronians, but at least they could gather fuel for themselves, which was running dangerously low at their base.

The Autobots went inside and started collecting the energon crystals from the cabinets. The crystals were a light shade of blue with white flecks, which meant it was medical grade that hadn't been refined yet. So, this was the medbay. A closer look around with their headlights made the place seem very creepy. There were two or three corpses lying around on the floor, a corpse lying strapped to the berth, and wreckage everywhere from where the ship had crash landed all those ages ago. Everything was covered in a layer of thick dust from the literal sands of time seeping into the ship.

As the Autobots made their second trip to get more energon, Bulkhead took a look at the berth with the unfortunate victim. He gave it a passing glance, but had to do a double take when he saw exactly who it was.

"No way…" Bulkhead muttered to himself as he drew closer to the prone form.

"Hey Bulk, what'd you find? Is it something cool?" Miko asked as she scampered over to where Bulkhead was.

Bulkhead didn't hear Miko. All he could see was _her_. This femme that had once been so dear to him and yet he hadn't spared a thought for in vorns...she was right there. She looked messy due to the situation, but otherwise she was the same. Same cherry red paint, same gold trim, and the same porcelain face plate. She looked so peaceful, as if she were only sleeping.

"How can she be here?" Bulkhead asked no one in particular, "How could she die in a place like this?"

"Hey, Bulkhead!" Miko yelled loudly to get the big 'Bot's attention, "Who is she?"

"Enamel," Bulkhead sighed her name as if saying it drained his very life force, "Her name is Enamel. What did the 'Cons _do_ to her?"

"Is she an Autobot? Was she tough like you? How long has she been missing?" Miko asked a barrage of questions.

"I don't know," Bulkhead admitted, "I haven't seen her since before the war broke out. I don't even know which side she chose."

Just then Optimus Prime came over to where Bulkhead was standing and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder guard. He had overheard the conversation and gathered that this dead femme was someone Bulkhead at least knew, possibly even cared about.

"I am sorry for your loss, Bulkhead," Optimus said solemnly.

"It's weird, Optimus," Bulkhead said forlornly, "I never pictured her in the context of the war. She was from my Golden Age days. I always picture her as healthy, snarky, and beautiful. She should be yelling at me, or talking about her day, or listening to screech music on our computer console back in Tyger Pax. Now here she is, lying on a Decepticon medical berth, chained down like an animal, covered in scratches and dirt. Enamel would never allow herself to be seen this way. She came from a high caste family. They valued appearances more than anything else. I wouldn't be surprised if the 'Cons tortured her just because of her family background."

"Assuming she didn't join them," Miko pointed out, "We don't know she was a prisoner. She could've turned evil or something."

"She wasn't evil Miko, but I have to admit, she could be selfish," Bulkhead chuckled at his memories, "I'll never forget the first time we met…"

* * *

 **The Past**

Bulkhead was exhausted after a long orn at the construction site. His formech, Scrapper, was a real piece of work, and if everything wasn't perfect it was the employees who suffered for it. Bulkhead tried to forget the rough orn as he walked home to his apartment with his friend Brawn who also lived in the same complex. For once it was a nice day. Tyger Pax usually got a lot of acid rain this time of vorn, so it was a pleasant surprise to be able to walk home without waiting for a storm to clear.

"Listen Bulk, remember that femme I told you I'm dating? The receptionist?" Brawn asked as he elbowed Bulkhead's side fraternally.

"Yeah I remember," Bulkhead wondered how he could forget with Brawn constantly talking about her, "So, she finally come to her senses and leave, or did you finally propose?"

"Neither," Brawn replied without offense, "Actually, I told Switchboard all about you, and she said she knows a femme that would be willing to go on a blind date with you. I figured we could double."

"A double date?" Bulkhead asked skeptically, "I don't know. What if she's a dud?"

"In our caste, can you really afford to be picky?" Brawn asked derisively, "You know most femmes won't bond with a mech that could be dead the next day. Laborers are expendable. We're just one tier up from slaves, and the safety codes in our area aren't exactly enforced. Live for the day, Bulkhead. Who knows? You might like her. You might even get to spark her after a few dates."

"You're such a perv," Bulkhead teased his friend, "Oh, alright. What's the worst that could happen?"

...

That night Bulkhead and Brawn drove to the coordinates of the restaurant where the femmes wanted to meet them. When they got there both mechs just stood there staring, certain they had the wrong place. They were at The Electric Truffle; one of the most exclusive restaurants in Tyger Pax! Only tower mechs ate there. This had to be some kind of weird joke their dates were playing on them.

Just as they were about to turn around and go back, two cars rounded the corner and transformed in front of the mechs. The light blue femme was of course Switchboard; Brawn's long-term girlfriend. The other femme had to be Bulkhead's date, but that somehow didn't seem right. She looked beautiful. Not just beautiful like Switchboard, but _expensive_. Every body part and every accent on this femme looked ridiculously expensive. She couldn't be Bulkhead's date!

'Hey, Brawn," Switchboard said in a squealy yet seductive voice, "I'm sorry we're late. Traffic was terrible."

"You're never too late for me, sparkles," Brawn purred before dipping Switchboard and planting a kiss right on her lip components.

As the two lovers made out, Bulkhead and the other femme were left to stare at one another. She grimaced at the sight of him. Even though he polished himself for the evening, Bulkhead still looked big, drab, and unshapely. It was clear that she wasn't impressed by him.

"So, uh...I'm Bulkhead," Bulkhead said awkwardly as he rubbed the back of his helm, "What's your name?"

"I am Enamel," The femme replied in a deep yet smoothly feminine voice, "If I may be nosy for a moment, how can someone be round and yet asymmetrical? It doesn't look possible, and yet you are."

Bulkhead growled softly to himself. How was he going to spend an entire evening with her? He wasn't even sure it was legal to date someone from a caste as high as hers. Then again, considering her attitude, maybe that was with good reason.

"So ladies," Brawn broke up the silent tension by speaking up, "Are we _really_ supposed to eat in here?"

"Of course," Enamel replied with forced politeness, "I have a reservation for four. We will be dining on the seventh level by the window. It's a revolving room and the view is quite lovely."

"Enamel said she would pay for the whole thing," Switchboard added, "Let's go in, Brawn! I wanna see the Spires of Omega from the window!"

Brawn and his date ran inside, leaving Bulkhead and Enamel to walk slowly behind them. Both of them looked as if they were walking into a den of scraplets. Neither one wanted to be there, but they were too polite to hurt each other's feelings.

Brawn and Switchboard took both seats that were next to the window, leaving Bulkhead and Enamel to sit next to the walkway. While the long-term lovers talked easily among themselves, Bulkhead and his date were having trouble starting a conversation.

"So…" Bulkhead dragged out that word as he tried to think of how to follow it up, "How do you know Switchboard?"

"I'm her boss," Enamel replied curtly.

"Oh," Bulkhead replied; unable to think of anything else to say.

"Bulkhead? You are a laborer, are you not?" Enamel asked curiously.

"Yeah? So?" Bulkhead snapped; daring her to insult him.

"You don't intend to rob me, do you?" Enamel asked unabashedly.

" _What_!? How _dare_ you?" Bulkhead shouted; causing several other diners to stare at him in derision, "You think just because I'm a low caste worker that I'm some kind of thug? Who do you think you are!?"

"I didn't mean to..." Enamel looked to be on the verge of tears, but she held them back as she composed herself, "...I'm sorry, Bulkhead. I didn't think about how that sounded. I've just never been this close to a laborer before. My father says your kind would just as soon kill a tower femme as look at them. I'm sorry. Really I am. Perhaps we can start over?"

"Sure, just as soon as the high grade gets here," Bulkhead growled, "We'll need it."

Enamel laughed despite the bite behind that statement. Her smile actually was quite enticing. Bulkhead looked at her optics, yellow with black sclera and a perfect almond shape. He could lose himself in those optics. He didn't really think anything would come of this, but she seemed truly sorry for hurting his feelings. He decided that maybe he should at least give her one more shot.

* * *

 **The Present**

Ratchet came through the ground bridge and sent Bumblebee back to operate it from the other side. There were dozens of bodies onboard this prison ship, and if even one of them was merely in stasis lock instead of dead then it was their duty to revive them. Ratchet kind of hoped there wouldn't be any survivors. Cruel as it sounded, he didn't want them to have to deal with Decepticons when they didn't have the resources to arrest them.

While Ratchet examined the corpses the Autobots continued to transport energon through the ground bridge. This would hold them for quite a while. Even the human kids took little pieces of energon crystals back with them.

Ratchet scanned every crew member on the bridge, in the engine room, and in several rows of private quarters. Every Decepticon was dead. When he made it to the brig, he secretly hoped that some of the Autobots prisoners survive, but sadly they had not.

Ratchet finally made it to the medbay. He saved this room for last since this was where the other Autobots were working. He didn't want to get in anyone's way.

Ratchet scanned the bodies on the ground, but all were dead. It was depressing, but expected. Then he scanned the body of the femme strapped to the table, and was surprised to see a very thin pulse of spark and processor activity! She was in stasis lock, and had practically no energon left, but she was still alive!


	2. Noise In The Night

_Author's Notes: Good news, everyone! I'm not dead yet! Also, I've got a new chapter of this fic up! Yay! I'm much happier with this chapter than I was with the last. The flow seemed to be off in the last chapter, but I guess everyone has off days sometimes. Also, I want to thank you guys for your support. This fic got some lovely reviews and a lot of views considering it was just the first chapter. Now we can kick this fic off properly! Please review, favorite, and follow to see more of "Can't Look Back". :)_

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Chapter 2

Noise In The Night

 **The Present**

When the Autobots arrived back at base Ratchet immediately rushed their patient to the medbay and started connecting an energon drip into her arm. Just being in stasis had caused her to lose a lot of fuel, and now that she was away from the life support system of the Decepticon transport Ratchet didn't have a lot of time to get her stabilized.

The 'Bot guardians deposited the kids on the upper level where the video game system and other human comforts were kept. The kids didn't want to play video games though. They wanted to know what was going on with the new 'Bot. Miko was especially curious, because Bulkhead had acted really weird when they found that red and gold femme.

Miko ran into the medbay to see that Bulkhead was already there. He was sitting off to the side and wringing his hands nervously. Miko had never seen him like that, and she wondered if this femme they found was special to Bulkhead in some way.

"Hey, Bulk. Hey, Doc Bot," Miko said casually; trying to cut through the gloom in the atmosphere.

"Miko, I have enough problems with _him_ here," Ratchet grumbled as he pointed a thumb at Bulkhead, "I don't need you in here messing things up, too."

"Aw, come on Ratchet! I haven't even broken anything yet!" Bulkhead protested, but when he went to gesticulate his arm brushed against a monitor; knocking it over and breaking it.

" _Bulkhead_!" Ratchet screamed, " _I needed that_!"

"Uh, maybe we should get out of here," Bulkhead told Miko sheepishly as he scooped her up and quietly left the room.

Bulkhead took Miko through the hallway and into the training room so they could give Ratchet plenty of space. He didn't really want to see the other 'Bots in that moment anyway. He was feeling kind of maudlin after seeing Enamel after so many vorns. Miko could tell Bulkhead was sad, but she wasn't sure what to say to make him feel better.

"Hey, Bulk?" Miko called softly from where she stood next to his pede on a mat for combat practice, "She's gonna be okay. Ratchet is the best. He'll fix her up in no time. You'll see."

"Part of me hopes so," Bulkhead replied ruefully, "But another part hopes she doesn't wake up. She'll have to see proof that our world was destroyed. She'll have to see the suffering and the pain. She'll have to see...me."

"Won't she be happy to see you?" Miko asked, "Isn't she your friend?"

" _Friend_?" Bulkhead scoffed, "Miko, she's my _ex_. We broke up on pretty bitter terms, and I refused to speak to her after I walked away."

" _You_ walked away from _her_?" Miko asked skeptically, "Did she cheat on you?"

"Maybe," Bulkhead shrugged, "I always kind of suspected it. Enamel was very hard to please. When we were young we thought as long as we had love and each other we could overcome anything. Turns out we couldn't overcome ourselves… or each other for that matter. I don't know how I feel about her being here. I hope she lives, but I'm also worried about what kind of life it will be. Will she be the same person after she wakes up? How will she feel about my first being a Wrecker and then a member of Team Prime? Was she an Autobot or a Decepticon?"

"Well, which side do you think she would pick?" Miko inquired.

"Hard to say," Bulkhead shrugged again, "I think she would lean toward Autobot, but I don't really know. Enamel kept a lot of her feelings inside, and she hated discussing politics. She said it reminded her of her family."

"You never did tell me," Miko reminded him, "You said your first date with her was lousy, so why did you go on another one?"

"It actually started before the first date ended," Bulkhead told her, "It was when I was driving her home…"

* * *

 **The Past**

To say the evening had been a disaster would be an understatement. Bulkhead's date was overbearing, emotional, and every now and then confrontational. Brawn and Switchboard had gone to the bar after a few breems had passed, and 10 breems later Bulkhead realized they had left the restaurant altogether! That left him alone with Enamel, and trying to make polite conversation with an elite femme was much harder than the laborer had thought possible.

They both seemed to walk on eggshells in each other's presence. Enamel was the type that would insult Bulkhead one moment, and then cry if he yelled at her for saying something hurtful. After a while she seemed to get her emotions in check, but it was hard for Bulkhead to think of safe topics of conversation. They mostly talked about the energon they were served and the different colors in the glass surrounding the lamps. Needless to say, it was stressful and boring.

When it finally came time to leave Bulkhead was relieved. He was sure his nightmare was almost over as he walked to the exit with Enamel following behind him.

"Well, uh…" Bulkhead couldn't say he had a nice time, and he was at a loss of what to say that wouldn't sound insulting, "...Have a good evening, Enamel."

"My goodness, it's so late," Enamel said as she eyed the black sky worriedly, "I've never stayed out this late before."

"Yeah well, time flies when you're having fun," Bulkhead said quickly as he made for the door, but stopped with what she said next.

"I've heard femmes of my stature are frequently robbed and murdered when they drive alone at night," Enamel said ominously; frozen in place as she stared outside.

"Oh, come on! You're afraid of the dark?" Bulkhead scoffed, unable to pretend this wasn't ridiculous to him, "You'll be fine. Just go home."

"I live 20 kliks away in Silicon Hills," Enamel told him, "Bulkhead, I know this is a lot to ask considering the less-than-stellar first impression I've given you, but could you please escort me home? I'll owe you a favor in return."

Bulkhead sighed wearily. He didn't want to hold this femme's hand and drive her across Tyger Pax to some gated tower community. He just wanted to go home and relax by watching the broadcasts before recharging. Still, despite what everyone assumed about him due to his status he was, at spark, a gentlemech. He couldn't just abandon a helpless femme in her time of need...even if she _was_ a pain in the aft.

"You don't owe me anything, Enamel," Bulkhead finally relented, "Let's go."

"Thank you, Bulkhead," Enamel replied gratefully.

Bulkhead just shook his helm at his own softsparked idiocy as he led the way to the road ahead. Enamel transformed, and Bulkhead couldn't help the whistle that escaped his lip components when he saw that stunning red and gold racer. She was a shiny convertible with gold trim, gold rims, and a little diamond hood ornament that looked like a bird of prey.

"Are you coming, Bulkhead?" Enamel asked; snapping Bulkhead out of his dazed stupor.

"Sorry," Bulkhead muttered awkwardly, "I'll say this much Enamel, you are very easy on the optics."

He was worried his comment might be rebuffed by the snobby femme, but to his surprise she laughed lightly and revved her engine for him to follow her. Her laugh was a lovely sound, and when she drove her gold accents shimmered in the street lights. Bulkhead didn't know how he could be physically attracted to someone he could barely stand, but then again he also wasn't sure how he could resist a femme that looked like a jewel-encrusted angel.

* * *

They drove for a few minutes in silence. Bulkhead wondered how long it would take for them to get to her house. The stars in the sky were barely visible, and the buildings sparkled against the skyline from the back road the pair was on. It was a beautiful night, and it made the drive very peaceful.

"Bulkhead?" Enamel spoke up after a few minutes.

"What?" Bulkhead replied; coming out of his daze.

"I want to apologize for the things I said earlier," Enamel said with a formal tone that failed to hide her contrition, "I should have known you weren't a thief or a masher. If you were then Switchboard would have never set us up together. She is one of my best friends, and I should have trusted her judgment."

"Your best friend is a common femme?" Bulkhead asked; unable to hide the faint accusation in his voice.

"I said _one of_ my best friends. I have several," Enamel corrected, "The truth is I've never been this close to a laborer before tonight. I didn't know what to expect, and I was scared. My father always told me low caste mechs only see tower femmes as a source of easy money or a target for sexual assault."

"Yeah well, my folks always said never trust an elite," Bulkhead said with a low edge to his voice, "They said an elite will use you, abuse you, and then leave you for scrap. If you're lucky. So far I haven't seen anything to disprove that belief."

"I would never purposefully hurt someone," Enamel assured him, "I understand why your parents said such things though. They were only trying to protect you. They must be good people."

"Yeah...They were," Bulkhead replied mournfully.

"Oh...I'm sorry," Enamel replied; understanding the implication, "How did they die?"

"My sire died when an unfinished bridge collapsed while he was under it securing the beams," Bulkhead explained, "My carrier died shortly afterward. I'm pretty sure she died of a broken spark. She and my sire were very close."

"I wish my sire and carrier were close," Enamel said ruefully, "They were bonded because their parents arranged it when they were younger. My carrier was the heiress to a vast fortune. My grandsire had made his living buying up asteroids and mining them for precious ores. My father was the son of a senator, and then became an advisor to the council-mech of Helex."

"Wait, your father is _Fireclap_?" Bulkhead asked incredulously, "Isn't he the mech that tampered with evidence that could've implicated Zeta for murder?"

"Yes," Enamel replied simply, "And if you think that's the worse thing he's ever done then you're very naive. My father might not be a member of the council yet, but he is a very powerful mech. He's the kind of mech you don't say no to. Trust me, I know."

Bulkhead didn't like the way Enamel said those last words. It sounded as if she had some personal experience with how Fireclap operated. He wanted to ask her, but he knew they didn't know each other very well. He feared he would just be intruding if he questioned her, so he decided to try to change the subject, but before he could, Enamel spoke.

"Sometimes I envy lower caste mechs and femmes," Enamel suddenly said.

"You envy us?" Bulkhead asked rhetorically, "That's a laugh! You have everything you could ever want while my people starve! What could you possibly envy us for?"

"Freedom," Enamel replied matter-of-factly, "I know in many ways you are not free, but you are at least free enough to say you deserve better. I'm not. From the time I was a sparkling my entire life was decided for me. My career, my home, and the mech I will marry have already been chosen for me, and there is nothing I can do about it. Not only that, but I must maintain a perfect polish. I must speak politely and demurely. I must be escorted by a bodyguard when I go to work. The truth is we are both practically slaves, Bulkhead. It's just that my bondage is more comfortable. If you want to know the truth, I snuck out of the house to go out with you tonight. My family thinks I'm in recharge right now."

"Seriously?" Bulkhead asked; slightly impressed, "Why would you risk all that just to go out with a laborer?"

"I didn't know you were a laborer," Enamel replied honestly, "I only knew you weren't Alabaster, and that was good enough for me. I know our evening wasn't that great, but I want to thank you anyway for trying. I know you tried."

Bulkhead grunted his acknowledgement but didn't say anything. What could he say? He had just gone out with a femme that was only looking for a one orn stand, and they didn't even have that together. This date had been a complete waste of time, but on some level he felt like he understood her better now. He supposed that would have to be enough.

"Hey Bulkhead," Enamel called out to him, "Do you like music?"

"Uh, I don't think we have the same taste in music," Bulkhead replied dismissively, "I don't like that classical junk."

"Neither do I," Enamel replied; a sly edge to her voice, "Personally I prefer metallic screech music. You ever heard of a band called Shaved Colored Pencils?"

"Are you kidding? I love screech music!" Bulkhead exclaimed enthusiastically, "Do you have the song _Saw My Face In Half_?"

"You bet," Enamel purred, "Pull over. I'll play it for us."

"You have a radio installed? Cool. I could never afford that upgrade," Bulkhead told her as they pulled over to a lookout point.

Bulkhead transformed into root mode, and Enamel did the same. She adjusted some buttons and dials on the inside of her chassis, and then the loudest most assaulting piece of screeching Cybertronian music blared from her radio.

Bulkhead screamed along with the instrumental parts of the song and pretended he was playing drums. Enamel smiled and looked at Bulkhead with a look that could best be described as amorous. She wasn't used to seeing him excited and playful, but now that she had seen it she could see the appeal. Bulkhead had so much energy. Not like her stuffy fiancée.

When Bulkhead stopped long enough to look at Enamel, he saw the dreamy look she was giving him and felt himself overheat. He looked away, embarrassed, but she pulled his servo to get him to look at her.

"Bulkhead...May I see you again?" Enamel asked as she bent her helm down shyly, "You may pick where we go next time. I know you weren't comfortable in that restaurant."

"Um...sure, I guess," Bulkhead replied; not sure what he was supposed to do now, "Maybe we could go to a concert or something."

"That sounds nice," Enamel said as she leaned into Bulkhead's frame.

Bulkhead wasn't sure how this happened. One breem they could barely start up a conversation, and the next breem he was embracing her in the twin moonlight and rocking out with her to screech music. Whatever the reason however, Bulkhead could feel himself gradually falling for her.


	3. Released

_Author's Notes: Hello to all my readers! I'm sorry it has taken me so long to post this chapter of "Can't Look Back". I don't know why I've put it off. I really like this story idea. The Present and Past segments are kind of like reading two separate stories, but the Past segments are there to show the contrast of Bulkhead's current relationship with Enamel in comparison to what they used to be. Eventually it'll show how they got to where they are now. Anyway, enough rambling. Thank you for reading, and please review favorite and follow to see more :)_

* * *

Chapter 3

Released

 **The Present**

Ratchet had worked on the frame and processor of the unconscious red femme for days. He monitored her closely, knowing she would awaken soon. He didn't recharge much in the cycles he spent tending to his new patient. He knew she would need to be briefed on everything that had happened on their world since she went into stasis lock. For one thing, she would be forced to learn that Cybertron was now a dead planet. He didn't look forward to telling her that.

It was oh-five-hundred according to the earth military clock installed in their base. Fowler had insisted on giving it to the 'Bots so they could keep track of earth time. Optimus had tried to explain that their computers had the correct time, but Fowler wouldn't hear of it. Ratchet just thought the government agent didn't know what else to give them, so he regifted that ugly olive green clock.

Ratchet hadn't recharged in three earth days, and he was starting to wear down. In order to keep himself awake, he went to the monitors to search for potential signs of Iacon relics. There hadn't been any lately, but one could never be too vigilant when the Decepticons were after some of Cybertron's most valuable treasures.

He watched the calm relaxing green and yellow lights of the scanners, and the glowing light blue Cybertronian text as it sped by in a straight line. It was so peaceful, and it made Ratchet feel so sleepy. Before he even realized it was happening, he was going into recharge at his work station.

* * *

Bulkhead had just woken up. It was oh-six-thirty and he was ready for his morning exercises. First he'd work the punching bag, then lob the ball for a little while, and then work on his hand to hand combat skills. He just hoped someone woke up to help him with that last part. Hand to hand didn't work with only one set of hands.

The first few minutes in the gym were uneventful. He rapidly punched the large 'Bot sized bag and allowed his processor to shut down. It was too early for thinking anyway.

Bulkhead's peace was soon interrupted however when he saw someone standing in the doorway looking in at him. The 'Bot was small but not as dainty as Arcee, so he thought it was Bumblebee.

"Hey 'Bee!" Bulkhead greeted his friend jovially, "Hey, come on over here and spar with me. I feel like kicking some tailpipe!"

"No, thank you," a deep feminine voice replied smoothly, "I haven't allowed you to hit me since the Golden Age."

Bulkhead gasped when he saw Enamel standing there, walking closer, with a familiar wry smile on her face plate. She seemed older in her mannerisms, but otherwise was virtually unchanged. It was as if time had reversed and Bulkhead was back in his home with her in Iacon, and he didn't like it.

"I must admit that I didn't expect to see you here, wherever _here_ is," Enamel told him as she circled him appraisingly, "Let me guess, I'm dead and you're my punishment for overcharging my patients. I suppose that's fair, as long as you're only temporary."

"Hah hah, you come to some weird conclusions," Bulkhead replied with forced humor, "Actually, you're on a planet called earth, on an Autobot outpost run by Optimus Prime. We found you in stasis lock aboard a Decepticon prison ship. You were the only survivor. You've been out of it for a long time, so there's some stuff you need to know. For one thing-"

"All I need to know is the speed limit," Enamel cut him off before he could finish explaining her situation, "Oh, and where to find energon. I suppose that's important as well. Everything else I'll figure out. Thank you for your time, Bulkhead."

"Thank you for your-!? _Enamel_!" Bulkhead shouted when she started walking away, and he had to rush to catch up to her in the hallway, "Enamel, we were lovers and bondmates for 400 vorns! We shared our lives together, our hopes, our dreams, our bodies! How can you act like this is just a bad job interview or something?"

"Would you look at this scratch?" Enamel muttered as she examined her arm, "I _have_ been unconscious for quite some time. There's rust in my joints! Ugh! All my hard work, _ruined_. What kind of cosmetic surgeon allows herself to turn to pot metal like this?"

"You're not listening to me!" Bulkhead shouted, "This is so typical of you! Whenever I would try to talk to you about a problem you would ignore it and change the subject! You need to know what's happened to Cybertron, so you're going to listen to me! Sit down so we can talk!"

Enamel's mood shifted suddenly, just as Bulkhead expected it would, to a look of hurt feelings and submission. She was very quick to shift her moods, and no matter how hard Bulkhead tried he often had trouble getting her to focus on a single topic. She sat down near the entrance to the medbay, and Bulkhead sat across from her trying with all his might to look calm and approachable. She really did know how to push his buttons, so he would have to work hard not to yell at her again.

"Enamel, I know this is going to be hard for you to accept," Bulkhead said gravely, "But Cybertron is no more. There is no energy on the planet, and everything has died except for the scraplets."

"Seriously?" Enamel replied flatly as she placed her servos on her lap, "Those blasted scraplets will probably outlast every black hole and star system known to Cybertronian kind. I hate those things so much…"

"You and me both," Bulkhead agreed, "Listen, Megatron and his forces are on earth too. Several Iaconian relics were placed on this planet for protection, as well as some Decepticon WMDs. We're outnumbered, outgunned, and currently living in an old missile silo left over by one of this planet's major governments. They're working with us, and we have human allies to help us stop the 'Cons, but it's gonna be a rough fight. We need every 'Bot we can get out there. I know we have our differences, and frankly I wouldn't ask you this if we weren't desperate, but will you join Team Prime to stop Megatron's tyranny once and for all?"

Enamel look at him for a long awkward moment with her steely yellow optics, and then barked out a single humorless laugh.

"Hah! You must be joking," Enamel scoffed as she stood up and wiped the dust from her thighs and arms, "I'm not joining anything, especially not the losing side! I tried that once, if you'll recall, and I got burned for it. I'm not siding with the underclass ever again, so you can just take your modified fists and your rhetoric somewhere else. As soon as I get a map and some energon I am leaving."

"Where will you go?" Bulkhead asked skeptically, "You don't know anything about anywhere now. You've been in a coma for too long."

Enamel turned away from him, knowing he was right but unwilling to admit it. She huffed, but when she looked back at him her face displayed pure misery and sorrow.

"I cannot stay here," Enamel repeated, but with less conviction than before, "You don't want me here, and eventually we'll just start fighting again. Believe it or not, I don't enjoy hurting you or being hurt by you. I am neutral. I have been neutral because it is the most prudent course. You can always side with a winner after the fact, but if you choose a side and lose, there is no mercy."

"So you're afraid to fight?" Bulkhead asked accusingly.

"I am a plate surgeon," Enamel protested, "I'm a medic on my best day, and a femme that buffs out scratches on my worst. All I've ever wanted was to make the universe a more beautiful place one frame at a time. Now all that exists is ugly, and I can't fix it. Bulkhead...I don't want to take orders from you, but you seem to be the only one in this room that knows what they're doing. Until further notice, I will play this game your way. Just remember that I've already been tortured once. If it happens again, I'm blaming you."

Bulkhead laughed despite the harshness of her tone. On some level he had missed the irritable femme. She could be annoying at her worst, but lively and passionate at her best. He remembered when arguments like this would lead to make-up sessions in their berth room. Now all he had to look forward to was begrudging tolerance and a cold shoulder. Somehow this didn't seem fair.

* * *

 **The Past**

Bulkhead couldn't believe he was in jail! This wasn't fair! He wasn't even a part of the protest on Silicon Street. He was just trying to get through the crowd of picketing factory laborers on his way to work. If Bulkhead were being honest with himself though, he didn't believe any of these other mechs belonged here either. They were just upset that automation was taking their jobs and forcing their families onto the streets. It was something Bulkhead likewise feared every day he lived.

He sighed, hoping that Enamel had gotten his embedded message. He hated asking her for money so soon in their relationship. They had only been going out for a few orns, but things were going pretty smoothly so far. Well, they _were_ , until he called her asking for bail. He was sure she would dump him for this. They'd only been out on 4 dates. That wasn't long enough to make it a solid relationship.

Bulkhead was sure she would probably just leave him there to rot. She had no obligation to help him, after all. Why risk her social standing by being seen in a jail surrounded by large filthy lower caste mechs? If her family found out it would be a huge scandal. He sighed again, and scowled when a dull grey mech pushed past him to get to a seat on the far corner of the cell.

After half a joor one of the guards came over. There were jeers and curses flung at the officer as soon as he approached, and Bulkhead almost felt sorry for the scrawny two-wheeler as his pedes shifted nervously.

"Um, excuse me! Attention please!" The guard shouted to get everyone to be quiet, but it barely lowered the volume level in the room at all, " _Excuse me_! Is there a mech here named...Bulkhead?"

"That's me!" Bulkhead stood up from the back of the room and raised his servo so he could be seen.

"Bulkhead? You made bail," The two-wheeler announced.

Bulkhead was cleared to step through the energy field that held the prisoners back, and walked slowly to the front desk with the guard by his side. Once they were out of earshot of the other detainees, the guard asked "So, who exactly owed you a favor? Are you blackmailing someone? You can tell me. I won't tell."

"What are you talking about?" Bulkhead asked; confused.

"I'm talking about your bail," The guard said slyly, "They sent some tower femme to spring you out. She looks like her detailing alone is worth more than my house. So, how'd you manage it? You have a relative that works in her home or something? Maybe you owe her something? Come on, what's the story?"

Before Bulkhead could answer him they were at the front room of the police station, and Enamel was sitting in a chair by a desk waiting for Bulkhead to arrive. When she saw him, a relieved smile crossed her face plate and she walked up to him with hurried steps to ensure he was, in fact, actually alright.

"Listen Enamel, I can explain-" Bulkhead said worriedly.

"Don't," Enamel cut him off sternly, "I don't care what happened. Just tell me you didn't harm anyone, and that you weren't mistreated in that cell."

"I didn't, and I wasn't," Bulkhead told her with a grateful smile, "I can't believe you drove down here. This is a bad neighborhood."

"Every place you take me to is a bad neighborhood," Enamel pointed out, "I know you worry, but I can handle myself. Besides, _you_ called _me_."

"Uh, miss?" The two-wheeler guard called out tentatively, "If you don't mind my asking, what is this mech to you? Is he an enforcer for your family's business? A secret lover? A day laborer you felt sorry for? Come on! This doesn't happen! You've gotta tell me!"

"No I don't," Enamel replied curtly; shutting down any further argument by walking away with Bulkhead holding her servo.

After they had walked for a few blocks, laughing every few seconds about the look on that guard's face, Bulkhead finally stopped and grabbed Enamel to turn her around to face him.

"I can't believe you actually did that for me," Bulkhead said in wonderment, "I know you and I like each other, but I still didn't actually think...I was just desperate to get out, but I didn't think you would really…"

"Save your aft?" Enamel finished for him, "I don't mind. Besides, to say I like you is the understatement of the vorn. You're the last thing I think about at night, and the first thing I think about in the morning. There are times when I long to touch your smooth chest plate, or look into your small yet bright blue optics. You know, only in Iacon is it common to find laborers with blue optics. In many regions only the wealthy can afford them. Fortunately cobalt is cheaper here than it is in most places. I'm sorry. I'm rambling. I suppose it isn't easy for me to relay my deepest feelings. My family isn't the type to speak many words of substance. It's all empty promises and small talk. You though, you share your spark's desires with me. You share your dreams and your fears with me. Forgive me for saying this but...I love you, Bulkhead."

Bulkhead openly gaped when Enamel said those words. He didn't expect her to care about him after having to bail him out of jail. The last thing in the universe he expected was for his new girlfriend to so quickly confess that she loved him! He wasn't sure how he felt about that. He didn't know if he loved her or not, but then again after seeing the way she handled herself and the way she risked her reputation for him...he was beginning to think that if he didn't love her yet, he could get there very soon.

"I'm sorry. Too soon, right?" Enamel asked sheepishly.

"Maybe, but I don't mind," Bulkhead replied with a small smile of his own, "Maybe I love you too. I don't know. Are we moving too fast?"

"Yes," Enamel said unabashedly, "But I'm a racer. My frame type always moves fast. I want to thank you Bulkhead. You've taught me more about the world and about myself in a few orns than I learned from my sheltered tower in a lifetime."

"I just wish the strike didn't have to happen," Bulkhead commented ruefully; changing the subject, "Why can't the higher-ups just pay us a living wage? I mean, I don't want to join the strike and break the law, but things are getting really out of hand. It seems like when the high caste mechs look at us all they see is disposable junk."

"Bulkhead, did I ever tell you about when I was 12 vorns old and received my second upgrade?" Enamel asked.

"No, what about it?" Bulkhead asked; confused by yet another change in subject.

"Well, when I was 12 vorns old there was a shortage of metallurgists to make new frames, so many younglings including myself were forced to adapt to used frame," Enamel recalled, "My frame was, to put it lightly, bulky. I was much wider than I should have been, and I transformed into a truck instead of the sleek race car I was meant to be. Don't get me wrong, I still had my expensive detailing and shiny red nanites, but I found it difficult to move in the bulkier frame."

"I don't find moving around hard, and I'm bulky," Bulkhead pointed out.

"Yes, but you were meant to be bulky," Enamel explained, "Your center of gravity is meant to handle the extra width, but mine wasn't. Anyway, one orn I went to the hardware store with my family's groundskeeper because I was just so desperate to get out of the house. He was such a nice mech. I remember his name was Meticule. But I digress. I went to the hardware store with Meticule, and while there I started wandering down the aisles. My frame was big, but I still managed to navigate the aisles without getting stuck. That is, until I made it to the internal circuitry aisle. When I got there I was confronted with the largest mech I have ever seen! He was _huge_ , so much so that his body took up the entire aisle! I could tell from his frame that he was either a construction worker or a miner. Well, I stared up at the mech with wide optics. I was thinking to myself that there was no way we could squeeze past each other because we were both too fat."

"Heh heh heh...Oh, sorry," Bulkhead apologized when Enamel stared at his snickering, "It's just hard to picture you as big."

"I was wide, not tall," Enamel clarified in a flat tone of voice before continuing, "As I was saying, when this gargantuan mech saw me, a high caste femmeling staring back at him with wide optics, he cringed and said 'I'm not bothering you. I'm not bothering you'. He just muttered that several times as he backed away from the aisle to get away from me. He was _afraid of me,_ because he didn't want to be accused of anything. I wanted to tell him that I wasn't judging him because of his caste or his size. I just didn't know how to get past him because we were both too fat. If anything it was something we had in common, but I never told him. I didn't say anything to him, because I was young and shy. It was all just a misunderstanding, but I never saw him again, so I could never tell him. I never told anyone this Bulkhead, but it has always bothered me that I allowed that laborer to fear me simply because we were from two different castes."

"Well, you were afraid of me when we first met," Bulkhead shrugged, "I think it's natural for low and high castes to be wary of each other. We don't always understand each other. Enamel, my people have been harassed and belittled for centuries. After so long of being treated as thugs and slaves, you tend to see it everywhere you go. Better safe than sorry, after all."

"I know. My people feel the same way. Better safe than sorry..." Enamel said in a soft regretful voice, "Bulkhead...Let's join the next protest."

"What? Are you kidding?" Bulkhead scoffed, "You're a tower femme. You'll be torn apart by that crowd of rioters!"

"Not with you there to protect me," Enamel said; her optics shining with confidence in him, "Bulkhead, this problem will never get better unless tower mechs and femmes acknowledge that our current system isn't good enough. You're a major part of my life now, so your struggles are my struggles. You deserve more energon and more time off. I just want to help you get what you deserve."

"You'd really stand out in the open street and carry a sign?" Bulkhead asked with a chuckle.

"Only if you'd do it with me," Enamel replied.

"Well...alright. Let's do it!" Bulkhead exclaimed as he picked Enamel up and planted a kiss on her lip components, "Let's change some processors all over Cybertron!"

Enamel whooped as Bulkhead twirled her around in the streets, and several onlookers stopped and stared at the unlikely couple. Bulkhead felt like he could conquer the world with Enamel by his side, and Enamel felt like she could trust Bulkhead with her very life. It seemed like nothing could slow down the young lovers.


	4. New Life

_Author's Note: Hi everybody! Thanks for all of your lovely comments and support for this story. I'm hoping to work on this one more often, but with so many fics on here and new ideas yet to be released onto the site I can't promise. I'll just say I'll try to give this fic the attention it deserves. At least this time I was able to get out a long chapter in a reasonable amount of time. Please review, and favorite and follow to see more of this story :)_

* * *

Chapter 4

New Life

 **The Present**

Bulkhead waited until everyone was awake and the kids were there before he told them Enamel had regained consciousness and was ready to meet them. Enamel had spent 7 hours in guest quarters without coming out, so Bulkhead went there to see if she was alright and ready to meet Team Prime. He just hoped she had managed to come to terms with Cybertron's destruction over the past few hours. He knew it was a lot to take in for someone in her situation.

Bulkhead knocked on the door, but when he didn't get a reply he decided to open the door anyway. He walked in on the familiar sight of his former bondmate standing in front of the mirror buffing out a scratch on her arm. The femme was such a perfectionist. Back when they were bonded it had been one of her most annoying qualities. She demanded perfection not only from herself but from everyone else as well. Now that it had been a few thousand years though, the action was almost cute again.

"Have you been doing that this whole time?" Bulkhead asked with a teasing smile.

"It's only been a little over a joor," Enamel replied indifferently as she continued to buff.

"Enamel, things work faster on this planet, and I'm going to need you to keep up with the rest of us," Bulkhead informed her in what he hoped was a patient tone of voice, "A solar cycle on this planet is only 4 joors. An orn makes up two earth weeks. We're on a tight schedule around here, and you'll need to be fast in order to keep up."

"You know me, wrecking ball," Enamel purred as she turned to give him a cocky grin, "I'm always fast."

"I know, sweet spark," Bulkhead replied; the term of endearment feeling both strange yet natural as he said it, "I'm real excited for you to meet my friends. I'm sure you'll love them."

"Oh, great," Enamel rolled her optics, "Just like old times. It's always your friends."

"What do you mean by that?" Bulkhead asked defensively.

"I mean when we had guests over it was always _your_ friends," Enamel reminded him, "You would invite your friends from the construction sites to play cards and get overcharged on high grade energon during your orns off work."

"Hey! When a mech works hard every deca-orn sometimes he just needs to relax and unwind for a while!" Bulkhead shouted; feeling attacked by the condescending tone Enamel used, "Is that really such a crime?"

"I had a job as well, Bulkhead," Enamel replied as she crossed her arms over her chassis, "Yet I never once resorted to high grade and staying up all night."

"No, you didn't. You just complained about every lousy thing wrong in your life, including me," Bulkhead groused, but then remembered something else he needed to say, "Oh, speaking of old times, there's something very important I need to warn you about."

"Yes?" Enamel sat down and patted the berth to invite Bulkhead to sit down next to her.

Bulkhead sat down next to her, and was surprised by the warm inviting smile she gave him. He hadn't seen her this welcoming of him in a long time. Of course, Bulkhead knew that her sweetness could turn to rancour without even a moment's warning. He knew he'd better make this quick.

"Well, about the Decepticons on earth-," Bulkhead began.

"Yes, yes, I know. They outnumber us and we're all going to die. I _get it_ ," Enamel interrupted him with a roll of her optics.

"That's not what I was going to say!" Bulkhead yelled, and then in a lower yet still frazzled voice said, "I was going to say that one of the Decepticons on earth is Breakdown."

"Really? That mech is _still_ living?" Enamel asked incredulously, "I was certain war would take him eventually. He never struck me as a survivor."

"Enamel, you haven't seen Breakdown recently, but trust me on this one, you want to stay as far away from him as possible," Bulkhead warned her gravely, "He led the charge against Simfur, and by the end of it there were no survivors of that city-state left. He killed mechs, femmes...he even crushed sparklings under his hammer. He's a monster Enamel, and my worst enemy. If he saw you he wouldn't hesitate to rip you apart and make me watch. Stay. Away. From him."

"I see. I must say I'm surprised," Enamel replied sadly, "I never thought someone like Breakdown could be so evil. He never struck me as the type."

"Seriously? You're _defending_ him?" Bulkhead asked incredulously, "You haven't seen him since the Golden Age! He's-!"

"I'm not defending him!" Enamel cut him off mid-sentence once again, "I'm merely saying it's a shock to me that this is what happened to him. Besides, part of me still wonders if you really are concerned about my safety, or if your jealousy is getting in the way of your clear judgment."

" _Jealousy_?" Bulkhead asked; his voice holding a disbelieving edge, "Look, I understand why you think that given our past, but I'm not fooling around. Breakdown is dangerous! Besides, I wouldn't have been jealous if you never gave me a reason to be. The way you spent so much time with him, the way you avoided the subject when I asked about it-!"

"Oh for the love of the Allspark!" Enamel exclaimed in exasperation as she threw up her hands, "I never interfaced with Breakdown! I never thought of him that way. He was just my student, that's all. Honestly Bulkhead, you would accuse me of sleeping with every mech that crossed our threshold, and they were _your_ friends! I never cheated on you, and I had to live with your accusations and disregard for vorns before you left! Ugh! I don't want to discuss this anymore. Can I just go out there and meet your new friends?"

Bulkhead sighed to try to calm down. He glared at Enamel, and she ignored him by pretending to flick dust off her armor. He wasn't sure if he could survive Enamel living on base with him. She was judgmental, careless, and constantly interrupted him when he tried to talk to her. At the same time though, he wasn't sure why they always fought. She wasn't a bad femme, and he wasn't a bad mech, but for some reason they brought out the worst in each other.

* * *

Enamel walked out into the main room where everyone was gathered. Bumblebee watched as Jack and Raf played a video game. Optimus Prime, Arcee, and Ratchet discussed Iacon relics they had yet to locate. Miko, as usual, was tuning her guitar and humming a Slash Monkey song.

"Hey guys," Bulkhead greeted them cheerfully; a stark contrast to moments ago in Enamel's room, "I want you to meet Enamel."

"I am pleased to see you were undamaged by your time in prolonged stasis," Optimus greeted her warmly.

"Thank you, sir. It is an honor to meet you," Enamel bowed respectfully, "Bulkhead speaks of you with high regard."

"So you're Bulk's ex, huh?" Miko asked bluntly, "He says you were a plastic surgeon. With a name like Enamel, I would've expected a dentist."

"I am qualified to work on dental plating if necessary," Enamel said with a smile as she turned one of her slender digits into a drill, "You must be one of the natives. I must say I love how much energy you exude. _Ah_ , to be young again…"

"Miko's my best friend," Bulkhead said proudly, "I'm also her guardian, so if anything goes wrong I'm right there to protect her."

"I see," Enamel replied indulgently, "Well little Miko, you could not have a better protector than Bulkhead. He not only has strong servos, but also a strong spark."

"Gee, I can't remember the last time you bragged on me like that," Bulkhead commented as he bashfully rubbed the back of his helm.

"Well it's true," Enamel chuckled, "Just because we don't always get along doesn't mean I'm incapable of seeing your good qualities. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised your best friend is a sparkling. I always believed you would be good with sparklings."

"Yeah, it's a shame we never had any sparklings of our own," Bulkhead replied wistfully.

"Uh, but you guys severed your sparks," Arcee pointed out, "Wouldn't that have just made it harder on any newspark you brought into the world?"

"You underestimate children, young femme," Enamel replied with a wan smile, "After all, you and the other Autobots take care of these human younglings, so you should know how strong they can be. I'll bet they come in very handy when the Decepticons attack."

"You bet!" Miko replied before anyone else could, "Hey, you wanna see my snaps? I've got lots of pics from the past few months. I even got a shot of a Vehicon from close up!"

"Oh my, that _is_ brave!" Enamel exclaimed approvingly as she leaned in to look at Miko's phone, "Who is this mech with Bulkhead?" She asked after a moment as she pointed to one of the photos.

"That's Wheeljack," Miko replied, "He and Bulkhead were in the Wreckers together! The best 'Con crushers to ever come out of Cybertron!"

"Yeah!" Bulkhead replied enthusiastically, "We busted up more 'Cons together than I can count. With the Wreckers we didn't call for backup: we called for clean up!"

Miko and Bulkhead laughed together over that line, and then Miko gave Bulkhead's extended finger a high-five.

"Yep, Bulk is one of the best fighters in the whole universe," Miko bragged on her friend.

"I see," Enamel replied noncommittally, "Perhaps I should properly introduce myself to Ratchet. He did save my life, after all."

With those words Enamel walked over to Ratchet's work station; leaving Miko and the other kids confused.

"What was _her_ problem?" Miko asked rudely as she looked over at Bulkhead, "She acted like she didn't wanna talk to us. She was fine a minute ago."

"That's just Enamel," Bulkhead replied dismissively, "Her mood can change within a matter of seconds. You get used to it after a while."

Enamel, meanwhile, spoke to Ratchet and did her best to hide the fact that she was uncomfortable in the Autobot base. The way Bulkhead spoke about Breakdown, and the way Miko spoke of Bulkhead as a violent Decepticon killer, was all very unsettling for Enamel. She had definitely seen the effects of the war, but she never imagined what Bulkhead would be like in such a context. She knew he would fight for his planet, but she never expected him to _enjoy_ it so much.

* * *

Later that night Jack and Raf had already gone home, but Miko had told her host parents that she was having a sleepover at a friend's house so she could stay longer with the 'Bots. Ratchet, of course, was annoyed by Miko's noise and constant questions as usual. Bulkhead was happy because they got to spend quality time together, but that happiness was laced with tension about whether or not Enamel would show up and ruin everything. She wasn't always a party pooper, but when she was in a bad mood she could kill anyone's fun.

Miko and Bulkhead were watching a wrestling match on television and cheering for Miko's favorite wrestler, The Whaminator. Both human and mech alike were whooping and hollering as The Whaminator throttled his opponent. Enamel walked into the room just in time to see them staring intently at the screen as The Whaminator was body slammed to the ground!

"Aw! You've gotta be kidding me!" Bulkhead yelled at the TV.

"Fragging scrap!" Miko cursed, "Get up, you slag heap!"

"Ahem," Enamel cleared her vocalizer to get their attention, "Miko, a lady doesn't use such words, especially not in mixed company."

"I'm not a lady!" Miko proclaimed, "I'm tough!"

"Miko, being a lady does not mean being a delicate flower," Enamel clarified as she wiped a bit of dirt from Miko's face with a digit, "Being a lady is all about dignity, self respect, and good character. Do not forsake the title of a lady, sparklet. You may be young, but you can still be a role model for others if you show the world you will not cheapen yourself just to please them. Now, do you want me to get you any snacks before recharge time?"

"I could use some more popcorn," Miko requested.

"I don't know what that is," Enamel replied, "Bulkhead, I hope I'm not imposing, but could you show me what each of the human foods are called again?"

"Sure," Bulkhead replied agreeably, "Hey Miko, pause it! I wanna see if The Whaminator pulls through."

"You got it, Bulk!" Miko replied before pausing the TV and putting her feet up on the coffee table.

After the pair were far enough away, Enamel turned to Bulkhead with a smile and said "She's a spirited young thing, isn't she? I am quite impressed with how well you get along with her."

"Yeah, she's a great kid," Bulkhead nodded before opening the storage closet, "So, which ones don't you remember?"

"Popcorn," Enamel replied, "Oh, and I forgot what this bag contains."

"Pork rinds," Bulkhead replied, "Miko's favorite is the fudgey bars. Jack likes the plain potato chips, and Raf likes the barbeque chips best. It's important to know that." He added with a cheeky smile.

"Oh, I can imagine," Enamel replied with a knowing smile of her own, "I can't look at fiber glass on a stick the same way after...Well, you know what it's like."

"Fiber glass on a stick?" Bulkhead inquired, "That pink stuff they sell at the carnival for sparklings to eat?"

"Yes, my son loved fiber glass," Enamel informed Bulkhead, "When he was little he loved going to the carnival, but always complained about getting dirty. I suppose he got that chip from me. I've always hated it when my fun messed up my perfect wax job. It's funny what you consider important when you're young…"

"Wait, hold up!" Bulkhead exclaimed skeptically, "Did you just say you had a _son_?"

"Technically Bulkhead, _we_ had a son," Enamel stated in a flat tone of voice, "I was carrying when you left me. If you'll recall, I tried to comm you a couple times after you left, but you hung up on me before I could say anything. Well, now I can tell you what I wanted to tell you all those vorns ago: congratulations you jerk, it's a boy, and he fortunately doesn't look like you."

Bulkhead was taken aback, not only by the news that he had a sparkling, but also with just how bitter Enamel sounded when she told him about it. He realized then one of the reasons why she had been especially argumentative with him since waking up; she had been forced to raise her son without him.

"Um, Enamel?" Bulkhead put his hand on her shoulder guard as he spoke, "Did you, I mean...I just wonder, I mean...did you move in with anyone else after we severed our spark bond? Did my kid grow up with another father?"

"No, Bulkhead," Enamel replied in a tired voice, "I had my fill of mechs after 400 vorns of being tied to you like a member of a chain gang. To be fair I would ask for help from friends when I could find them, but for the most part I didn't have any help."

"I'm sorry I wasn't there," Bulkhead replied ruefully.

"Don't be," Enamel replied as she hugged Bulkhead, "Together we would have just made a miserable home for him. At least this way there was no yelling. I will say this, our son had your sense of adventure and outgoing personality. I'm grateful for that, because I feel I can be a bit...verbally castrating at times. I don't mean to be, it was just how my parents raised me. I hope he's alive out there, somewhere. Then maybe you can meet him."

"Maybe…" Bulkhead replied with a small smile as he led Enamel back to the main room with a human-sized bucket of popcorn.

* * *

 **The Past**

Bulkhead and Enamel had been dating for a couple vorns by now. They had to keep their romance a secret from Enamel's family lest Bulkhead get in trouble, but every now and then she would show up where Bulkhead worked and give him his lunch. Bulkhead's friends all knew about Enamel, and many joked that she was the worst kept secret in the slums of Iacon.

One time Bulkhead and Enamel had protested the use of drones in factories that made frames and protoforms. The police had come to break up the protest. Bulkhead had been badly beaten during the struggle, but they didn't get arrested because Enamel and Brawn had dragged Bulkhead into the factory building; the last place anyone would look for members of a picket line. That time had been too close, so they never went on another protest after that one.

On this day the suns were shining down on Iacon and everything looked bright and happy. Enamel knew Bulkhead wasn't getting enough energon in his rations, so she prepared him a cube of energon infused with melted organic fossils from offworld and zinc. She enjoyed mixing together different additives to make new and interesting flavors, and since Bulkhead loved to eat she always had a willing test subject for her recipes.

She arrived at the construction site to see the mechs working hard to prepare a condemned building for demolition. She stayed back and waited patiently for lunchtime to arrive. She didn't like to interrupt when Bulkhead was working because she knew how important the income was to him.

After half a joor the mechs stopped to refuel, and that was when she walked onto the site and waved to her masculine beau.

"Bulkhead! I brought you some extra energon!" Enamel called out, and Bulkhead waved her over to be with him and the guys.

"Hey sweet spark," Bulkhead greeted her before pulling her over to sit on his lap, and she giggled and she pretended to struggle, "Say, what's that wonderful smell? It smells like zinc. I'll bet it's one of your great chemical mixtures,"

"Of course," Enamel purred as she lifted the cube to his mouth to feed him, "Only the best for my strong solid wrecking ball."

"I still can't get over you two," Brawn said from his place sitting to Bulkhead's left, "And to think you used to call me lovesick. You two are worse than me and Switchboard ever were. Hey Huffer, you ever seen anything this sickly sweet in your life?"

"Once, but they have a suppository for it now," Huffer joked.

Bulkhead's coworkers laughed and Enamel got off his lap just to make the embarrassment stop. Of course she didn't really care what they thought. They were just jealous of what she had with her mech. Still, she didn't want to look disrespectful or unladylike in regards to Bulkhead. He had enough problems without having issues with his reputation as a tough guy.

Brawn playfully punched Bulkhead in the arm, and Enamel rolled her optics at the immature mechs. When she looked away, however, she saw a worker she'd never seen before coming their way with a stack of boxes.

"Hey guys, I found the rivets," The new mech announced, but then got a look at Enamel and dropped the box and screamed, "AHH! Oh, pit! Is the boss here? Is that his daughter? Is this an _inspection_!?"

This over-the-top reaction just made the other mechs laugh even harder than before, and Enamel couldn't help but laugh as well seeing a large construction mech lose his scrap like a sparkling at the medic's office.

"I just have one correction to make to your inquiry," Enamel said after regaining her composure, "This construction site is owned by Makeshift, who is barely able to keep control of it. My father could buy this enterprise several times over. I'm sure you've heard the name Fireclap in passing?"

" _Fireclap_? The financial advisor of Sentinel Prime?" The new mech asked worriedly, "What is he doing _here_!? Nobody did anything! Right?"

"Relax, kid," Bulkhead chuckled, "Fireclap isn't here. Enamel is my girlfriend. Nobody's in trouble."

"Wow, you're dating an elite?" The new mech asked incredulously, "That's amazing! I bet you get a lot of free stuff."

"Oh, for the love of the Allspark…" Enamel muttered as she held her forehead in her hand.

"Uh, maybe some introductions are in order," Brawn suggested to pacify the situation, "Enamel, this is Breakdown. He was ordered from the Allspark to be our new demolitions and hammer mech. Breakdown, this is Enamel of Tyger Pax. She's a plate surgeon and has been dating Bulkhead for 2 vorns."

"2 _vorns_? That sounds serious," Breakdown replied in awe, "You are so lucky, Bulkhead. I couldn't get a femme that hot if I looked like Sunstreaker the gladiator."

"If you ever want to try to look like Sunstreaker, my office is downtown," Enamel replied as she handed Breakdown her business card, "Also, if you ever do get worked on, don't change the chassis. The symmetry is already perfect."

As Enamel walked away Bulkhead played over that last statement in his processor. When they first met the first thing Enamel complained about was his lack of symmetry. Bulkhead had never been one to be sensitive about his looks. His creators never made him feel that his looks were abhorrent. His job didn't require him to look like a cover model. He never thought about needing to be attractive before, but now that he was in a relationship with a femme that any mech would kill for it made him question things.

Bulkhead looked down at his massive hands, his short legs, and his big gut. Did Enamel find him unattractive? Worse yet, was she flirting with Breakdown? He was younger than Bulkhead, and more handsome. Could Enamel leave him for someone else, even someone with the same low caste as him? Bulkhead was distracted for the rest of the work day wondering if he was losing the love of his life to his own imperfections.

* * *

That night Bulkhead had commed Enamel and asked her to meet him at the lookout so they could look up at the stars. Enamel thought that would be so romantic, so she agreed to meet him. When she drove up he was already in robot mode lying on his back looking up at the inky black sky. She transformed and joined him; lying on her chassis and resting one of her hands on his arm.

"Enamel, there's something I want to ask you," Bulkhead said without turning his helm to look at her, "Do you think we have a future together? I mean, do you think we'll ever get bonded and have a family? Do you think there's more to us than just right now?"

"Of course there is," Enamel replied without question, "I don't know how, but I'll get out of my engagement to that good for nothing toadie my father wants me to marry and then I'll be all yours. I'm sorry it's taking so long, but you don't realize just how dangerous my father is...even to me."

"Oh, I'm sorry, sweet spark," Bulkhead whispered, "I wish I could just scoop you into my alt mode and take you away from all that. I wish we could just drive into the horizon and not stop until we find a world that will accept our love."

"Wow...That was actually pretty deep of you Bulkhead," Enamel replied breathlessly.

"Thanks, I got it from a song on the radio," Bulkhead replied sheepishly, but then in a more serious tone asked, "So, you definitely want to be with me? You don't, I don't know, want some other guy instead, right?"

"Of course not," Enamel replied casually; not suspecting his fears, "There is just one stipulation I would make to your plans for us though."

"Oh yeah? What's that?" Bulkhead asked.

"I don't want any sparklings," Enamel stated with absolute certainty, "I don't like sparklings, and I don't think I would be a very good carrier. Sparklings are so sticky, and they break things. I hope that's not a deal breaker."

"It's not," Bulkhead replied as he rolled over on his chassis and wrapped his arm around Enamel's shoulders, "I have to admit I'm a little disappointed though. I like sparklings, and I always wondered what it would look like if you and I had a kid."

"It's not worth a lifetime of codependency to find out," Enamel said firmly, "Bulkhead, let's just look up at the stars for a while longer. I could use the silence."

Bulkhead obliged, and the happy couple cuddled with each other as they looked up at the galaxy beyond them and dreamed of their lives together. Bulkhead felt better knowing that his beloved Enamel's spark belonged only to him, and Enamel felt better now that they weren't discussing sparklings anymore.


	5. Bonding

_Author's Notes: Hi guys! Sorry this chapter took so long. This one is most a segue into the rest of the fic to come. There's a lot of character moments and fluff in this chapter, but these things are necessary to establish the tone of future chapters. Thank you to everyone who is reading and supporting this story. Please review, favorite, and follow :)_

* * *

Chapter 5

Bonding

 **The Present…**

Bulkhead didn't recharge that night. He just layed on his berth and looked up at the ceiling; lost in thought. He had a son. Enamel had given him the sparkling he always wanted, and he wasn't even there to see it. Bulkhead wondered if his son had died, or if the Decepticons had taken him prisoner the way they did Enamel. He wondered what his little boy had looked like, and what he would look like now. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't even notice at first that someone was softly knocking on his door.

"Huh?" Bulkhead grunted after a minute or two of the knocking, "Oh, uh, come on in!"

Enamel opened the door carrying a cube of light blue energon and a buffer. She wore a tired and glum expression; far different from the playful smirk she wore in her youth.

"Bulkhead, you didn't show up for your morning energon ration," Enamel said wearily.

"It's morning?" Bulkhead asked obliviously.

"Ugh, honestly! Bumblebee's room has a window. You should insist to the Prime that you be given a room with a window as well," Enamel harrumphed, "I can't believe the way they treat you sometimes. You're their best frontliner, and certainly the strongest. I have half a processor to give the Prime a real talking to."

"They treat me fine," Bulkhead stuck up for his friends, "Just give me the fragging cube, Enamel."

"Of course, dear," Enamel used the affectionate term as if it were second nature, and Bulkhead found himself distracted by that for a moment, "So, would you like any additives in your energon today? I don't have much available, but I think I have some cobalt powder and a sprig of europium."

"That's okay, I like it plain," Bulkhead replied before he took a swig of the cube.

"I'm sorry I don't have zinc and copper. I know you like that combination," Enamel said in a conversational way; hesitant to leave, "Bulkhead? Um, I couldn't help but notice the scuff marks on your back struts and the dirt in your tires. Would you like for me to polish you?"

" _What_?" Bulkhead choked on his energon in surprise.

"Well, I used to buff and polish you after you had a rough day, and I can tell last night was very rough for you," Enamel explained, "I just want to help you feel better."

"You used to do that when we were newly bonded," Bulkhead pointed out skeptically, "By the time I left you didn't care if I was dirty unless I was tracking it across the floor."

Enamel turned away and looked at the door, and Bulkhead couldn't see her face plate. He could tell though, she was taking his words as a personal rejection. He felt bad for questioning her motives after she had made an earnest effort, and sighed deeply and shook his helm in defeat.

"Alright Enamel, if it'll make you feel better you can clean the crud off my back," Bulkhead grumbled like a kid being forced to bathe.

Bulkhead quickly downed the rest of his energon and then layed on his chassis on the berth. Enamel started by using the buffer on Bulkhead's back, and then took out a thin tipped brush for the tires. Bulkhead sighed contentedly, remembering for the first time in vorns how good this felt. Enamel occasionally hummed a Cybertronian tune as she worked on him, and Bulkhead found himself drifting off into recharge.

Enamel stopped when she heard him snoring, and chuckled a little at the sight of him recharging like a sparkling. This was exactly what he used to do back when they were first bonded. It had been so long since she had seen him that it felt like she was getting to know him again.

"Pleasant dreams, wrecking ball," Enamel whispered before she tiptoed out of the room with buffer in hand.

As she backed away from the room she bumped into Ratchet, who had been walking to his own quarters.

"Oh! My apologies, Doctor," Enamel exclaimed in embarrassment, "I just didn't want to wake up Bulkhead."

"He's _still_ in recharge?" Ratchet asked in exasperation, "He's got duties to attend to!"

" _Shh_! Ratchet, please lower your vocalizer," Enamel hissed, "Bulkhead didn't recharge last night, and he needs to stay offline for at least a joor."

Ratchet sighed in irritation but ultimately granted Enamel's request for Bulkhead to continue to sleep. He got a data pad out of his quarters and went back to the medical bay, where he saw Enamel was already sterilizing his instruments.

"It'll be nice to have some help around here," Ratchet stated, "I just hope you're not as clumsy as your ex-bondmate."

"I'm not," Enamel assured him, "I do know what you mean, however. Bulkhead's design doesn't lend itself to delicate work. He means well of course, but if I were a medic I wouldn't hire him as my assistant."

"Well, up until now I haven't had much choice," Ratchet groused, "Alright, first of all I want you to catalogue our various chemical samples. I haven't had time to get to it. Be sure to be thorough. I want to know _exactly_ what we have available."

"Of course, Doctor," Enamel nodded sagely.

Enamel felt a little offended at the condescending way Ratchet spoke to her. She had, after all, once had her own medical practice. Then again, she also knew he was under a lot of stress from being a field medic on the losing side of the war and therefore didn't want to judge him too harshly. She knew the best thing for the team was for her to just shut up and do her new job...even if it was degrading and tedious.

* * *

Later that day, Bulkhead awoke to one of his favorite sounds in the world: Miko's guitar solo. He sang along with the out of tune instrumental as he got up and walked to the main room where she was playing. He saw that almost everyone else was occupied, and that Miko was left to her own devices while the boys played video games.

"Hey Miko, great song!" Bulkhead shouted enthusiastically; though he was probably the only one who thought that.

"Hey Bulk! Where've you been? I've been here for over two hours!" Miko huffed as she put a hand on her hip.

"Sorry Miko, it was a rough night. I just needed a little extra recharge," Bulkhead replied apologetically.

"Yeah, your cherry girlfriend told me that, before she pushed me out of the medbay," Miko pouted.

"Enamel isn't my girlfriend," Bulkhead corrected her, "She's my ex wife. Actually, that's worse now that I think about it."

"What's her deal, anyway?" Miko asked, "Sometimes I think she's nice, but then she starts acting like she's better than me or something. I can't figure out if she's a jerk or not."

"Me neither," Bulkhead smirked, "That being said, she was pretty nice to me this morning. She served me breakfast in berth, and then cleaned up my tires. It was weird. It almost felt like we were dating again. I'm surprised she'd ever wanna talk to me again after what she told me last night."

"What? You mean about the popcorn?" Miko asked obliviously.

"No, she said I had a son," Bulkhead replied in a low tone of voice that betrayed how unsettling he found this situation, "Miko, when I left she was carrying my sparkling. She had to raise my son without me. She should hate me, so why is she being so nice to me?"

"I dunno. Maybe she wants to get back together with you," Miko shrugged.

"Nah, that can't be it," Bulkhead shook his helm, "All we do is argue. She stopped loving me vorns ago. I stopped loving her vorns ago, too. At least, I think I did. Did I? Aw, it's so confusing!"

"Then just ask her," Miko reasoned.

"I can't just ask her!" Bulkhead exclaimed anxiously, "She'll think I want her back."

" _Do_ you want her back?" Miko asked point blank.

"I...I don't think so," Bulkhead replied uncertainly, "At least, I thought I didn't. When I look at her now though...I mean, she buffed my back for frag's sake. She kept everyone away so I could recharge in peace. She looked out for me just like she used to. 400 vorns of marriage and a son I never met. Why did I throw it all away? Just because I thought she was cheating on me? We could've worked through that. We could've made it work if I just hadn't run off like a coward!"

"I don't think so, Bulk," Miko remarked, "I mean, I'm not saying you couldn't get back together, but I've heard the way you two talk to each other. You've both got a lot of baggage, and you'll need to work through it if you're even going to be able to stand working together. Don't rush things. If you two are meant to be, it'll happen. In the meantime, you and me got some off-roading to do!""

"Heh heh, you always know how to cheer me up, Miko," Bulkhead said with a smile, "Hey Ratchet, can we get a ground bridge? I'm taking Miko to Nebraska!"

"What the pit is in Nebraska?" Ratchet asked skeptically.

"Nothing, that's the whole point!" Bulkhead replied gamely.

"Yeah, just me, Bulk, and the open range! Whoohoo!" Miko cheered.

"Just comm us if you run into trouble," Ratchet insisted.

"Yes, and don't stay out too late," Enamel added from her position beside a tray full of tools.

"Yes, mommy," Bulkhead replied mockingly.

Enamel scoffed and waved a servo to shoo them away. "Just come back in one piece you two. Have fun."

The ground bridge opened, and Bulkhead and Miko were off to do some stunt driving. Bulkhead still had a lot of questions in his processor, but at least for the moment he could put them to rest and have a good time with his best friend.

* * *

 **The Past…**

Bulkhead sat on the floor of his small apartment and watched a gladiatorial match on the broadcast screen. He was _so_ hungry. The energon famine was getting worse, and the elite class, rather than helping the lower caste mechs starving in the streets, doubled down and pushed for laws that would make them richer while the masses suffered. Bulkhead tried to put these thoughts out of his helm and watch the match, but his tanks continued to hurt and demand energon.

There was a knock on the door, and Bulkhead could tell from the delicate wrapping that it was Enamel. He smiled and got up to see his beautiful femme.

When he opened the door he saw that she had streaks on her face plate from where she had been crying. Bulkhead knew that she had to have cried recently, because there was no way she would go out in public without washing any imperfections off herself first.

"Enamel, what's wrong baby?" Bulkhead asked as he opened his arms and engulfed her in a comforting hug.

"I'm sorry to bother you, Bulkhead," Enamel said softly; her voice sounding both tired and desperate at the same time, "May I come in?"

"Sure," Bulkhead stepped aside to let her pass, "I don't have any energon to offer you, but you can watch the broadcasts with me."

"I'll buy us some energon once I calm down," Enamel sighed, "Bulkhead...I don't know quite how to ask you this, but I need a favor from you."

"Anything, sweet spark," Bulkhead replied as he took her servos in his, "Just name it."

Enamel closed her optics and looked like she was about to cry again, but the coolant never came. When she looked up at Bulkhead, however, her black and yellow optics were dimmed in a way that seemed downright pathetic on such a young and pretty face.

"My love," Enamel said the term in an almost pleading fashion, "I need a place to stay for a few orns. Just until I can raise enough money to get my own apartment."

"What are you talking about?" Bulkhead asked in concern and confusion.

"Oh, Bulkhead! My father found out about us!" Enamel wailed before pressing her face into Bulkhead's armor, "My parents know what we've been doing, and I have been disowned by them! They insisted I leave you and marry Crossroads, but I told them I wouldn't do it. That was when father kicked me out of the tower and said I was no longer welcome in his house! I've lost everything! I cannot go home, and I've been cut from the will! The building where I run my practice is owned by my father, and now that's gone too. I'll have to find a way to earn enough money to rent a new office, and get a new place to live. I don't want to impose on you darling, but I have nowhere else to go. Please may I stay here Bulkhead? Just until I find another solution?"

Enamel continued to cry for a few more seconds, and Bulkhead gently rubbed the tires on her back.

"Actually, I might already have another solution," Bulkhead told her; a smile forming on his face, "If you bond with me, then you'll never have to leave."

"Bond with you?" Enamel gasped, "Wait a klik, are you proposing to me?"

"Yeah. You wanna do it?" Bulkhead asked with a lighthearted shrug.

"You're a hopeless romantic, wrecking ball," Enamel deadpanned, "Oh, why not? We've been dating for vorns now. With the energon crisis and the riots, who in their right processor would care or even notice a mixed caste bonded pair?"

"That's the spirit, sweet spark," Bulkhead said affectionately.

Bulkhead then lifted up Enamel's chin and kissed her lip components. She melted into it; allowing herself to forget for a moment all the scrap that had happened that orn. Everything was going to be alright. She knew she made the right choice. Her parents only loved her when she lived up to their expectations. Bulkhead, however, loved her for the femme she really was. They would bond, and they would build a life together. In that moment she felt safer than she could ever remember.


	6. A Dream Deferred

_Author's Notes: Warning: Mentions of Cybertronian interfacing. It's not too graphic, but I figured I should still mention that in case there are sensitive readers in the audience. Now that that's out of the way, I am excited to post this new chapter because I feel it's more exciting than the first. This one focuses mostly on the present, but the past segment is still an important one for seeing how Bulkhead and Enamel began to grow apart as well as how she grew closer to one of Bulkhead's friends. Thank you guys so much for reading this story. I've gotten a lot of support for this fic, and for that I'm grateful. Hope you enjoy this chapter of Can't Look Back :)_

* * *

Chapter 6

A Dream Deferred

 **The Present**

Enamel stayed behind with Ratchet to prepare the medbay while the rest of the Autobots went to an energon mine for a raid. There had been a lot of Decepticon activity lately, and Enamel was concerned that Bulkhead or any one of them might come back injured...or not come back at all. It didn't help Enamel's stress levels that Miko had convinced the Autobots to allow her and the boys to go with them to the mine to explore.

The two medics busied themselves with placing tools in convenient locations and wiping off berths and other surfaces with washcloths. Ratchet sighed a few times, and Enamel sighed a few times. They were both clearly worried about their friends and trying not to think about it.

"Remind me again why they allowed the sparklings to go with them?" Enamel asked Ratchet in an accusatory tone of voice after a few minutes of silence between them.

"Who?" Ratchet asked uncomprehendingly.

"The sparklings! Miko, Jack, and Rafael. _Remember_?" Enamel snapped as she organized a few data pads that contained information on complex surgeries.

"Oh, the children!" Ratchet nodded in understanding, "Humans don't call their young sparklings."

"Miko could be killed," Enamel said in a low confrontational tone, "She is practically Bulkhead's daughter. How could they be allowed to go along on this mission?"

"It's just energon scouting," Ratchet reasoned, "There will most likely not even be any Decepticons present."

"You say that like it's a day out at the park," Enamel replied incredulously, "I know Miko is fast, but she is so tender and malleable. What if she falls from a high place or gets underfoot? What if she eats something that's dangerous to her kind? You know how curious she is!"

"By the Allspark, Enamel! She isn't a toddler!" Ratchet exclaimed when he couldn't take anymore of her complaining, "I don't like it either, but you try stopping her! She and the other children are curious beings. Apparently it's a common trait among humans."

"They are more than just organics, Doctor," Enamel said; her voice softer and less intense than before, "They are family. Do you not see the way Jack looks up to our Prime? He views Optimus as a role model. Rafael treats you like a wise mentor. He loves Bumblebee like a brother, and has even learned Cybertronian just to be as close to us as possible. That's not even mentioning Miko."

"Yes, well...you'll get used to them being around after a while," Ratchet groused, though there was slight amusement in his tone despite him pretending humans still bugged him.

"I looked up some information on Miko shortly after meeting her," Enamel informed him, "She's been arrested before back in Tokyo. She used spray paint to graffiti the wall of her school there. The students who turned her in stated that they were frightened of her because of her 'attitude problem'."

"I didn't know that," Ratchet replied quietly; stunned by the revelation.

"It is clear she is not that person anymore," Enamel said; her face having a thoughtful expression, "Bulkhead has done much to help Miko become a better person, that much I can tell. I just don't want him to forget that she is still vulnerable."

"You talk about Bulkhead like you still care about him," Ratchet noted, "Enamel, are you still in love with Bulkhead?"

"I don't have to answer that," Enamel replied curtly, "He is here, I am here, and we are making the best of our situation. Whatever I feel is irrelevant."

"You do still love him, don't you?" Ratchet inquired, though it was clear he already knew the answer.

/Ratchet!/ Optimus Prime's voice resonated over the computer's comm system, /We need a ground bridge, now!/

Ratchet wasted no time in pulling up a ground bridge and getting everyone back in time. Optimus Prime came through the portal with Bumblebee, the children, and Arcee. They were quickly followed by Bulkhead and a mech Enamel had never seen before. The new mech, white with green and red markings and head fins, looked badly injured but was still conscious.

"What did you two knuckleheads do this time?" Ratchet snapped when he saw Bulkhead trudging through the medbay with the other mech's arm over his shoulders.

"We were ambushed," Bulkhead explained.

"Yeah, place was crawling with 'Cons," The other mech added, "Nothin' one of these couldn't handle. Heh heh heh."

Enamel's optics went wide when she saw the mech was gently tossing and catching an explosive device in his servo.

"Bulkhead, who is this maniac?" Enamel demanded to know.

"That's Wheeljack!" Miko spoke up before Bulkhead could, "He and Bulk were both Wreckers together, and they're one of the best 'Con crushing teams around!"

" _Great_. Another friend of Bulkhead's," Enamel said sarcastically, "Alright, get him on the berth. Ratchet, will you need my assistance to repair this...mech?" She said instead of the insult she was actually thinking.

"No, you just repair the fuel lines in Bulkhead's right arm. I'll take care of Wheeljack," Ratchet replied in a longsuffering tone of voice.

"Say Bulk, what's with the fussy femme?" Wheeljack asked before he sat down on the berth for Ratchet to repair him.

"That's Enamel," Bulkhead explained, "She's my ex."

"Ouch! Good luck, big guy!" Wheeljack chuckled before wincing at a painful loose wire in his leg.

Enamel led Bulkhead to another berth and began deftly working on his arm. She didn't say anything to him while she worked, but Bulkhead could tell she was fuming mad at him for some reason. He debated with himself whether to ask about it or simply to let her work and forget it.

"You shouldn't take Miko out on missions like that," Enamel finally said; forcing Bulkhead to have to deal with this, "She could've been hurt, especially with a loose cannon like that _Wheeljack_ person running around."

"Jackie's my friend!" Bulkhead replied defensively.

"They're _all_ your friends until they're not," Enamel said bitingly, "Most of the time I never even bothered learning their names. You've made so many friends over the vorns, and you'll undoubtedly make more. It's who you are."

"You say it like it's a bad thing," Bulkhead commented sourly.

"No, it's not a bad thing," Enamel admitted with a sigh, "It just made me feel left out. I was in your life long before Wheeljack, yet you were ready to take his side over mine. And why? Because he's your _friend_. You've had hundreds of friends. The word means very little to you, and yet I mean even less."

Bulkhead didn't reply. He knew Enamel had just been concerned about him and was taking out her emotional stress on him. It was what she used to do when they were bonded. It was also one reason why he left her.

"How did you even get this injury?" Enamel asked as she soldered his fuel lines back together, "This looks like heat damage."

"Breakdown held my arms back while Knockout prodded me with his shock stick," Bulkhead explained bitterly.

Enamel gasped and dropped her tools when she heard him say that.

"What happened next? Did you hurt them?" Enamel asked in concern.

" _Them_?" Bulkhead balked, "You're worried about the 'Cons? Oh wait, I know what this is. You were worried I might hurt Breakdown, weren't you? You're still pining over that waste of energon, aren't you!?"

"What? No! Of course not!" Enamel exclaimed offendedly, "I just wanted to know what happened! Not everything is about you and your over-inflated ego!"

"Why can't you just admit you liked him?" Bulkhead yelled, and the others in the room turned to see what was going on, "Do you think I'm stupid or something?"

"Yes, but that has nothing to do with your accusations," Enamel snapped back, "If you want your arm fixed go see Ratchet about it! You can rust for all I care!"

Enamel then stormed out of the room and slammed the door to her quarters. It was an automatic sliding door so they didn't quite know how she managed to slam it, but she did.

Bulkhead snorted angrily as he sat there and waited for Ratchet to finish with Wheeljack before getting to him. Of all the things for her to ask him, it had to be about Breakdown! Well, when he was done with his repairs he was giving her a piece of his processor, and this time she was going to listen!

* * *

It had taken 45 minutes for Ratchet to get to Bulkhead, and another 10 minutes for repairs. In that time Bulkhead still hadn't cooled off, and he was ready to find out once and for all why Enamel was denying her involvement with his rival.

He stomped through the hallway leading to her room and banged on the door with all his might. He knew he was probably being too aggressive, but he didn't care; he was mad and she was avoiding him. Oddly enough the door opened for him immediately, and Bulkhead strode into the room to see Enamel was standing by her berth and waiting for him to speak.

"Why can't you just tell me the truth?" Bulkhead growled; trying with all his might to control his volume.

"Why can't _you_ tell _me_ the truth?" Enamel shot back calmly, "You still want me. If you didn't then you wouldn't care if someone else possessed me."

"That has nothing to do with any of this!" Bulkhead shouted, "I want-!"

"Hush!" Enamel barked back in a whisper, and then drew Bulkhead closer to her by grabbing his scruff bar with her slender digits, "Shh, no more words. You want something from me? Just shut up and take it, wrecking ball."

To say Bulkhead was surprised by the turn this was taking would be an understatement. Enamel pulled Bulkhead close, rubbed her body against his, and then flung Bulkhead onto her berth and jumped on top of him! He couldn't remember a time when she was that strong, and it was a little disconcerting. He felt her trying to pry away his chassis armor, and he threw her off of him and onto the floor!

"Are you _crazy_!?" Bulkhead yelled; more than a little flustered.

"You want me, don't you? That's what this is all about, isn't it?" Enamel asked; her tone still confrontational but her optics flaring with lust.

"So you want to interface with me to prove you didn't sleep with Breakdown? That doesn't prove anything! This means nothing!" Bulkhead shouted as he gestured to the room with his arm.

"I'm glad we're in agreement," Enamel said bluntly.

She then layed down on her berth and her chassis armor automatically retracted; revealing her protoform, a few internal wires, and her thrumming spark. Bulkhead took one look at her like that and involuntarily shivered with excitement. She smirked at him, and he gulped reflexively; trying to remember what they had been talking about.

"Oh come on, Enamel! This isn't fair!" Bulkhead exclaimed shakily as he watched her stretch out and saw the crackle of her spark reacting to the motion.

"Come on, wrecking ball," Enamel whispered in a seductive voice, "We both want to forget this day. Let's forget everything and just enjoy each other."

Bulkhead wasn't made of stone. He couldn't resist Enamel, who despite her age still looked like a pristine heiress. He climbed into the berth with her, and their sparks connected as if they had been waiting for each other for the centuries they had been apart. Bulkhead had almost forgotten about the warmth of her plating, the taste of her glossa, the feel of her servos exploring his frame, and the glow of her black and yellow optics. It was a perfect moment, and one he hoped to experience again soon.

* * *

The next morning no one could figure out why Bulkhead wore such a large grin on his face plate. They remembered that he had been angry the day before, but then when they next saw him he was whistling a happy tune and looked like nothing had ever been wrong with him. Even when Enamel woke up he was friendly towards her and any resentment seemed to have been forgotten.

"Enamel," Optimus called out to the red and gold femme, "I need to discuss something with you."

"Of course sir, what do you need?" Enamel asked in a professional tone.

"You have been awake on this planet for a while now, but you have yet to leave the base," Optimus told her, "In order to blend in with the humans and drive wherever you need to go you need a vehicle mode. One of the children may accompany you to aid in your decision."

"Ooh, ooh! I wanna go! I wanna go!" Miko called out hopefully.

"Well, you do seem to have a good sense of direction," Enamel replied as she pretended to ponder the choice, "Alright Miko, take me someplace good. I want an alt mode that would make the racers of old _weep_ with jealousy."

"Remember, the point is to fit in," Arcee reminded her, "Don't pick a mode that would be easily noticed."

"No offense dear, but what's the point of having a body nobody notices?" Enamel asked in a snarking tone, "Not that you would know, _shiny blue motorcycle_."

Arcee scowled at how blunt Enamel's words were. She, like all the other Autobots, had seen the judgmental and reserved side of Enamel. They weren't used to the vain and flashy side of the former elite. Bulkhead, on the other servo, just chuckled at how she was acting. He remembered how she would spend joors in front of the mirror at home and how often she polished her frame. It was just like old times for him, including all the good things those old times came with.

* * *

Miko and Enamel ground bridged to a new car lot in Jasper, Nevada. It was twilight on a Saturday morning, and the lot wasn't open yet. The selection wasn't great, but at least there was variety.

"Ooh, how about this one? It looks really powerful!" Miko exclaimed excitedly as she pointed to a Hummer and jumped up and down like a kid in a toy store.

"Powerful isn't really my strong suit," Enamel replied apologetically, "Besides, that design would make me look bulky."

"Alright, how about this pick-up truck?" Miko suggested as she ran over to a large black truck.

"No thank you. Too Ironhide," Enamel dismissed the vehicle with a wave of her servo, "Oh, this looks promising."

Enamel then walked over to a red 2012 Buick LaCrosse sedan. She inspected every inch of the car from hubcaps to grill, all the while humming and nodding. Finally she stood upright once again and said "Yes, this will do nicely."

" _That_?" Miko asked in disbelief, "But that's a total mom car!"

"Yes, but it's a fancy mom car," Enamel said with a smirk.

Enamel then scanned the car with a pale green light built into her optics. Once the scan was complete she transformed into an exact duplicate of the Buick, with the only noticeable difference being Enamel's golden grill and rims.

"What do you say, youngling? Want to go for a ride?" Enamel offered as she opened the driver's seat door for Miko.

"Cool!" Miko exclaimed as she hopped in, "Let's drive down the cliffs!"

"Um, I'm going to go with _no_ ," Enamel snarked, "I'm just going to drive us back to the base so Ratchet doesn't have to waste energy powering the ground bridge again."

"Aaw," Miko sulked.

Enamel chuckled at the girl's antics. Ah, to have a youngling in her alt mode again. She hadn't felt this happy since her own son was Miko's (mental) age.

"You really are the fun police, you know that?" Miko griped.

"Yes, I know, and I'm not upset by that," Enamel replied as she took off (at the exact speed limit) down the road and back to the base.

When the two females made it back to the base Miko went straight for the video game that Jack and Raf were already playing. Enamel was so busy looking up at the girl that she almost walked into Bulkhead.

"Oh, I apologize for the- What is that?" Enamel asked flatly after actually taking a good look at Bulkhead.

Bulkhead was holding a large plant in his servo with lots of dirt falling out of its roots. She looked it up online, and found out it was called a mimosa tree. It looked just like a green bouquet with pink flowers.

"I picked this for you, sweet spark," Bulkhead replied with a warm smile as he pushed the bouquet of tree into her servos, "I remember you liked the color pink."

"Yes, I do, but...Bulkhead, what are you doing?" Enamel stammered in bewilderment.

"I just wanted to get you something nice," Bulkhead replied with the youthful excitement Enamel had seen in Miko a half hour earlier, "You know, now that we're back together."

"We're not back together," Enamel said bluntly.

"But you...we just-!" Bulkhead choked; at a loss for words.

"We interfaced Bulkhead, but you were the one who said it meant nothing," Enamel reminded him, "And you were right. It meant nothing."

"Are you fragging kidding me!?" Bulkhead snapped; his emotions somewhere between confusion and outrage, "But then why-!"

"Because I wanted to," Enamel shrugged before placing the tree gently on a counter, "You are the only mech I've ever interfaced with in my entire life, and you know how I am, Bulkhead. I like familiarity. I was amorous, and you were available. If you ever need me to relieve you sometime, then you are free to ask me, but don't expect a permanent relationship from me. We tried that once, and I don't regret it, but I won't bond with you again. I'm sorry if this hurts you."

Bulkhead didn't even try to stop her as she walked away. He was dumbfounded by what had just happened. Enamel had done many things to him in the past, but she had never used him like this before. He didn't know what their relationship was now, but he knew one thing; she had betrayed him. Whether or not she had ever fragged Breakdown didn't matter anymore. She had still betrayed his trust.

* * *

 **The Past**

He forgot again. It was their 300 vorn anniversary and Bulkhead forgot again! Enamel knew he had trouble remembering dates and she would normally forgive such an infraction, but tonight she returned home from the plate clinic and had seen that her house was full of raucous laughter and many mechs. She had assumed those were party guests for their anniversary. She had assumed that Bulkhead would remember an anniversary as important as this one, but he didn't.

Enamel went inside and found that it was just Bulkhead's buddies from his construction team at work getting overcharged with him as they watched the gladiatorial fights on the broadcast screen. She sighed when she came through the door, and no one even noticed she had entered. She decided to be quiet as she snuck into the fuel room. If Bulkhead heard her come in he'd ask her to get them some high grade, and she would probably throw something at him in white hot frustration.

Bulkhead's high grade habits were getting to be a problem. They could barely afford the electric bill, yet he insisted on buying high grade along with their regular energon. He would even buy it for his friends! Enamel growled when she thought about how many credits he wasted. It had actually gotten to the point where she started lying about how much money she earned so she could put some away in case something happened.

With Bulkhead's job it would be very easy for him to be killed in an accident or injured, and injured members of the lower caste were usually killed by their superiors for their uselessness. It didn't matter who was waiting for them at home or if they were technically free mechs. Everyone in the low castes was a slave to the council.

Enamel needed to get her processor off such grim thoughts, so she started washing used cubes. Many Cybertronians had taken to using disposable cubes, but Enamel preferred the classy look and solid feel of a real glass cube.

She growled again. These weren't even cubes she had dirtied! These belonged to Bulkhead and his processor-dead friends! Most of them leered at her when she went by the construction site these days. 300 vorns of diligently driving to the same workplace to deliver Bulkhead's rations didn't matter when the mechs were so quickly replaced. Most of the mechs Enamel had met when she first started dating Bulkhead had either died or were fired. She didn't know most of them now, and she no longer wanted to know them. After so much time of disillusionment she no longer wanted to be a part of Bulkhead's world outside of their home.

The door to the fueling room opened, and Enamel was startled by the sudden intrusion. She quickly turned around and saw it was one of Bulkhead's friends; Breakdown. She was relieved that she at least recognized this one, but she really wished the overcharged lout would get out of her fueling room.

"Do you need something, Breakdown?" Enamel asked coldly; hoping he would take the hint and leave.

"I heard you in here, and I was wondering if I could talk to you about something," Breakdown said in a surprisingly small and sober voice given his usual boisterous nature.

Enamel sighed in an effort to calm herself down and try to stay civil to the mech. He was one of the few that wasn't a massive creep around her, and she didn't want to make him feel completely unwelcome despite her bad orn.

"What is it, Breakdown?" Enamel asked in a gentler tone of voice than she used a moment before.

"Well, I know you're a plate surgeon, and I've heard investors talk about you when they appraise the lands we build on," Breakdown said nervously as he twiddled his thumbs and stared at the ground, "Everybody says you're the best there is when it comes to cosmetic surgery, and I was wondering...will you teach me?"

"Teach you what?" Enamel asked uncomprehendingly.

"Ma'am, I've been a demolitions mech since the orn I onlined," Breakdown tried to explain, "I hate it so much. The hours are long, the other workers tease me because I get scared easily by higher caste mechs watching us, and I'm always needing to have my arms replaced because my hammers constantly break on the hard metals we work with. Enamel, I don't want to be a glorified hammer for the rest of my life. I want to be a medic. Even an medic's assistant would be good. Could you teach me medicine, please? I'll pay you for the lessons."

"You can't afford it," Enamel shot him down quickly, "If you want this don't say you'll pay me, because a real degree costs tens of thousands of credits. That's how they keep low caste mechs out of university. You could never be a medic, because that requires a degree in cybernetics and also a degree in anatomical composition. There are also the optional degrees that determine one's specialty, such as my degree in frame history and my elective in Iaconian art."

"Oh, okay," Breakdown replied defeatedly as he hung his helm, "Sorry I wasted your time. I'll go back in there with the guys. The fight's probably back on anyway."

Breakdown turned to leave, and Enamel felt a pain in her spark for this poor mech. She was so used to seeing complacency in the lower caste that the idea of a mech trying to better himself had simply never occurred to her. Yet here he was, and she had just dashed his dreams with a few biting comments.

"Wait!" Enamel found herself calling out to him before she could stop herself, "You cannot be a medic or a surgeon, but it is possible to become an assistant without a degree. Most assistants are built in The Well for that specific purpose and have frames much smaller and more delicate than yours, but if you had enough knowledge then it might be possible."

"Really?" Breakdown perked up when he heard that.

"Now understand that this will not be easy," Enamel elaborated in a firm tone of voice, "Because of your unconventional frame you will have to work harder than any member of the medical caste. You will need to have medic-level knowledge, and still you will only be paid the wages of an assistant. Most clinics won't want to hire you. You may have to move to a city with less priviledge than Iacon. A place like Kaon or Polyhex might accept an assistant that looks like you. Are you really sure you want this though? It would be easier to simply accept your lot in life."

"Hey, nothing worth doing is easy!" Breakdown exclaimed as he pounded his fists together gamely, "Teach me everything you know, Doc. I'm ready."

"Not now. Come by my clinic tomorrow and I will let you observe me work with my patients," Enamel said with a small smile, "Might as well start with some in-depth training. You won't actually get to do anything at first, but I will quiz you on the day's events so pay attention."

"You got it, boss!" Breakdown replied cheerfully before he left the room to rejoin his friends.

Enamel sighed again, this time in a more wistful manner than before as she thought about what she was doing. She was going to try to turn a hammer into a scalpel. This already seemed like a bad idea, but he just looked so eager and excited to learn. She understood now why so many old medics became professors late in life.

"Oh well," Enamel sighed as she shook her helm, "Happy anniversary to me, and thanks for nothing Bulkhead."


	7. Confrontation

_Author's Notes: I actually finished this chapter yesterday, but the fanfiction website was glitching then so I couldn't upload the file. I tried all day with no luck, so I am super happy I am able to upload today! Yay! Anyway, this chapter turned out pretty much how I wanted it to, and I hope it's a good one. Thank you guys for reading and reviewing, and I hope you're all having a great week :)_

* * *

Chapter 7

Confrontation

 **The Present**

Jack, Miko, and Raf came to the Autobot base after school as had become the custom lately. Miko was looking forward to showing Bulkhead her new binder that had a picture of the band Slash Monkey on the cover. She jumped out of Bumblebee's passenger side (he had picked them up from school) and ran inside to look for Bulkhead.

She found Bulkhead in the training room punching a bag harder than usual, and he looked angry.

"Hey Bulk, what's up?" Miko called out loudly to be heard over the sound of the blows Bulkhead was delivering to the punching bag.

Bulkhead looked down at Miko, and he tried to school his features so he didn't look quite so upset.

"Hey Miko, just working on my hooks," Bulkhead replied with fake joviality.

Miko arched her eyebrow and gave Bulkhead a look that said 'I'm not buying this'. Bulkhead groaned and sat down on the bench against the wall, with Miko following closely behind.

"It's Enamel," Bulkhead finally admitted, "We, uh, spent some _quality time_ together yesterday."

"So? I thought you two wanted to be friends again," Miko reasoned.

"No Miko, I mean we spent some... _grown up_ time together," Bulkhead said quietly; embarrassed to talk about something so personal with a young femme; even if she was human.

"Oh," Miko nodded in understanding, "So does this mean you two are back together?"

"That what I thought, until this morning," Bulkhead growled lowly, "I got her a bouquet and told her about my renewed love for her, and she told me flat-out that she used me for a plaything! What's worse, she pretty much said I was free to act the same way toward her. What kind of relationship is that? Enamel was my mate for over 400 vorns, and she acts like it was a casual hookup! What kind of a mech does she think I am? She has so little respect for me that she thought I would be okay with using her and being used! Miko, I don't know what to do. I have to see her every day now that she's an Autobot, yet she treated me like an old oil rag. How can I keep myself composed around her when she hasn't changed at all?"

Miko listened quietly for a change as her friend spoke of his woes. The sadder and more defeated Bulkhead became, the angrier it made Miko. Enamel was already kind of boring as far as Miko was concerned, but to hurt her friend in such an intimate way? No, this time that red and gold glitch had gone too far.

* * *

Enamel was in her quarters calibrating a device that Ratchet needed for deep armor scans. It seemed that the best way to forget where she was and what had become of Cybertron was simply to keep busy. She was interrupted from her mundane task when she heard a soft knock on the door. She opened it to see Miko standing there with a hard expression on her normally chipper face.

"Why Miko, it is so good to see you," Enamel greeted the teenager politely, "May I offer you anything? A chair? Perhaps a...well, actually I don't keep human fuel in my quarters, but you're more than welcome to use my rotary buffer."

"Get out," Miko barked in clipped tones.

"Um...excuse me?" Enamel replied; perplexed.

"You heard me," Miko replied coldly, "You've caused nothing but trouble since you came here, and now you're hurting Bulkhead. You need to leave, _now_."

"What happens between Bulkhead and I is none of your concern," Enamel replied; her tone stiff to match Miko's aggression.

"Oh, yes it is!" Miko contested harshly, "Bulkhead is my best friend, and if you mess with him then you mess with me. Are you ready for that? Because I don't think you are. I can become your worst nightmare."

"And I could squish you if I so chose," Enamel pointed out, "However, I don't see why our relationship has to be doomed. Try to understand Miko that the relationship I have with Bulkhead is a complicated one, and has been for some time. I don't really want to get back together with him, but on some level...I miss him."

Enamel's vocalizer hitched on that last statement, and she stopped talking for a moment. Enamel then wiped away a drop of cleaning fluid from her optic, and turned back to Miko once she had composed herself.

"Have you ever been in a romantic relationship, Miko?" Enamel asked.

"No," Miko replied, though she still didn't seem placated by Enamel's current emotional display, "I'm not ready for all that."

"So then you understand how serious it is?" Enamel prodded.

"Yeah, do _you_?" Miko snapped angrily, "Because Bulkhead is upset right now because you used him!"

"I never meant to hurt him," Enamel replied quietly, "But why would he want me back so badly? _He_ left _me_ , Miko. He walked out on any hope we had for a family and a future. Yes, I know people can change their processors about things, but that means nothing when I am confronting the mech that twisted my spark around for so long. I hated how miserable he made me, yet I loved how good he could make me feel when we had a good orn. I cannot simply see the end of our love when I look at him. I also see the burning passion we once had. We used to be young and felt that together we could change the world. Now the world is gone and I have nothing familiar in my life except for him. Yet I do not know if it is love or loneliness. I do not expect you to understand. I do not even understand."

"Are you gonna apologize to Bulkhead?" Miko asked pointedly.

"I suppose I should," Enamel sighed, "I suppose I will. I should not have complicated things here. I just...missed his energy and his warmth. Physical intimacy can be a great comfort when one is facing down their own mortality, but I suppose I was being selfish. All I can say youngling is learn from us. Someday you may likewise face the end of the world, and I hope you can do so with more dignity than I did."

Miko and Enamel parted ways then, Miko to go play video games with Jack and Enamel to keep her promise and apologize to her former bondmate.

* * *

A few days passed in relative calm. Bulkhead was still hurt, but he accepted Enamel's apology anyway. Oh some level he understood her feelings of loneliness, but at the same time he hated that she had been underhanded toward him. Either way they agreed to keep their relationship professional from that point onward.

It was early noon when the Autobots heard the alarm from their computer. The Decepticons were on the move somewhere in the Andes Mountains, likely mining energon.

"Autobots, there could be humans near that area, so we must go to protect them," Optimus told them, "We are also in desperate need of that energon. Arcee, Bulkhead, Bumblebee, and Enamel, let's roll out."

"Wait, sir! Me?" Enamel asked incredulously, "I would be useless out there."

"Don't you have a weapon installed?" Arcee asked.

Enamel transformed her digits into five tiny drills and five tiny scalpels.

"Digit drills? That's it?" Arcee asked critically.

"I am a surgeon, not a soldier," Enamel stated sternly, "However, I suppose if you are going out there to get yourselves killed I might as well join you. You'll need someone to put you back together."

"Now you're starting to sound like Ratchet," Bulkhead chuckled; much to Enamel's annoyance.

With that argument settled, Optimus decided it would be best to send everyone they could since there would be safety in numbers. Enamel was nervous about going out there to face the evil that had consumed her world like Unicron itself, but she wasn't about to show that to the Autobots. She would not be made to look like a coward in front of those younger 'Bots and her former bondmate. Together the Autobots went through the ground bridge into the unknown…

...And found themselves surrounded by Vehicons!

"Take cover!" Optimus shouted as the drones began to shoot the Autobots.

Most of the Autobots scurried around rocks in an effort to get into the cave where the energon was being mined from. Optimus continued to shoot to provide cover for his troops, and everyone else ducked around rocks, trees, and anything else they could find.

Enamel realized she was separated from the group, and was terrified at being surrounded by so many drones. She dared to venture a peek from around the tree she was hiding behind, and saw that Bulkhead and Bumblebee had made it inside the cave while Arcee continued to dodge Vehicons with the grace of a dancer. Enamel nodded to herself that she could probably get closer as well, so she made a run for it.

As Enamel ventured closer to the cave she saw that a ground bridge was opening a mere few yards away from her, and a big Decepticon was coming out! She had no time to take cover, and when the ground bridge closed Breakdown was standing right in front of her!

"E- Enamel?" Breakdown stuttered when he saw her; his only optic widening in disbelief, "But...I thought you were dead. I took you into that prison ship myself! No…you're not here. My processor is obviously playing tricks on me again."

"What happened to your optic?" Enamel asked; ignoring his stammering, "You welded a piece of cheap steel over it."

"Well we don't exactly have proper supplies around here and-! Wait, so, you're really here?" Breakdown asked; still unable to believe it.

"Yes, I'm really here," Enamel stated in a patronizing tone, "So, how is Knockout doing?"

"Pretty good," Breakdown said, but then he shook his helm and shouted in a harsher voice, "Wait a klik! Don't talk to me like we're discussing the weather! You came back from _the dead_! I know you shouldn't still be here! I captured you, took you to the prison ship, and saw them begin experimentation on you! You should be _dead_!"

"You sound disappointed," Enamel replied with an amused smirk, "Well big guy, here's your second chance. Hurt me."

Enamel's forceful words caught Breakdown off-guard for a second, which was exactly what she was counting on. She whipped out her tiny scalpel and sliced it across Breakdown's abdominal struts! Breakdown howled in pain, and then angrily grit his denta as he prepared to give chase to the fleeing femme.

Enamel knew that wouldn't buy her much time. Normally she would have severed the cables to his wrists, but she knew that Breakdown was a medical assistant, and somehow it just didn't seem right to damage the hands of a healer; no matter how much of a scraphead he was.

Breakdown transformed into his alt mode to catch up to her, so Enamel transformed as well. Optimus saw that Breakdown was pursuing Enamel, so he shot at the approaching 'Con. Breakdown, not ready to face down the power of the Prime, drove away with his tires screeching.

The other Autobots came out with energon crystals in tow, and Optimus ordered a ground bridge. Everyone ran for it, and made it back to base unharmed and with a cache of energy to live off of for another orn.

"So Enamel, how was your first mission?" Bulkhead asked with a smile on his face plate after they were safely inside the base.

"Uneventful," Enamel shrugged, "I believe I should invest in a weapons upgrade, however. Perhaps see if Ratchet can build me a pistol or something."

"Can you shoot?" Bulkhead asked curiously.

"No, but I need a weapon I don't have to install," Enamel explained, "My surgical equipment is far too valuable to scrap. By the way, you have a cut on your backside. I can fix that for you."

"Thanks, but it'll heal on its own," Bulkhead replied good-naturedly; the former ugliness seemingly forgotten.

Enamel went back to the medbay then to talk to Ratchet about exterior weapons. She was relieved that Bulkhead didn't know about Breakdown's involvement in her capture or that he had been on the battlefield with them. She knew if Bulkhead was aware of such a thing that he would hunt the blue and white Decepticon down like a turbo fox, and she didn't want Breakdown's energon on her conscience.

* * *

 **The Past**

Enamel onlined after a fitful night of recharge. Her body ached, and she was having trouble coming to herself. She stepped off the berth and into a pile of broken glass and metal shards, and then the entire previous night came rushing back to her in a wave. She and Bulkhead had another fight.

He had come home after blowing his paycheck at the bar and was overcharged out of his helm. Enamel, tired of dealing with his insufferable addiction, berated him without restraint. That caused Bulkhead to yell at her, and before long they were throwing anything at each other that would break. Last thing she remembered was Bulkhead passing out on the couch. Sadly this was nothing new for her.

She sighed and slowly trudged into the living room to take inventory of everything that was damaged. Oddly enough Bulkhead wasn't there. It wasn't like him to online so early after an evening like that, but Enamel was just grateful she didn't have to wake him. There were bits of broken items all over the floor just like in the berth room, and with all the enthusiasm of a dental checkup patient she found a dustpan and began to clean up the damage.

After a breem or two of attempting to tidy up Enamel heard a banging noise coming from their garage. That was the place where Bulkhead liked to keep his tools, so it was likely him messing around in there. Enamel just sighed again and continued cleaning.

It was a quarter joor later that Bulkhead came back inside through the front door. He was stomping around, indicating he was still angry from the night before, and he seemed to be ripping things from the shelves and pulling various items out of drawers. Enamel growled low, not knowing what was going on, and tried to ignore him. After he pulled a picture off the wall however, she couldn't take it anymore.

"What are you doing, Bulkhead?" Enamel snapped as she stood up from cleaning junk off the floor.

"What I should've done a long time ago," Bulkhead snapped back at her, "I'm leaving. Goodbye, Enamel."

" _Leaving_?" Enamel repeated incredulously, "Wait, do you mean to say you're severing your spark bond with me?"

"You got it," Bulkhead replied even as he continued to forcefully throw items into his subspace compartment, "I've had enough of this, and I think this is what's best for both of us."

"I...you... _How dare you_!?" Enamel shouted in white hot rage, "After everything I put up with from you, the drinking and the cursing and your rowdy friends, and you have the _gall_ to leave me!? I gave you my youth, Bulkhead! I gave you _my spark_!"

"And I did the same for you," Bulkhead pointed out, "Look Enamel, this can't go on. All we do anymore is fight. I know you're never gonna have the struts to leave, so I'm leaving. You can have the house, but I'm taking everything in this dump that rightfully belongs to me."

"But...Where will you go?" Enamel asked; her voice much more timid and pained than before.

"Someplace where you won't find me," Bulkhead replied resolutely, "You tear me down and you make me feel like less than a mech. I put up with my formech all day and then you all night. I can't take it anymore! You criticize everything about me, and I just want to go someplace where I can live in peace and be myself. I hope you can understand that."

"Oh, I understand," Enamel replied bitterly, "You think I'm a sparkless glitch. Well then, you might as well get it over with. Let me tell you something though, if you walk through that front door then you are never allowed to enter this house again."

Bulkhead gave her one last sad look, and then with a painful _pop_ their sparks disconnected from each other. For the first time in 400 vorns they couldn't feel each other, or anything other than themselves, and it physically hurt.

Bulkhead then left the house with the possessions he had managed to cram into his subspace, and Enamel walked over to the front doorway and watched him as he transformed and drove away; out of her life forever.

* * *

A few orns passed after Bulkhead left, and Enamel was stuck in a depression she couldn't escape. The money she earned at her medical practice was barely enough to cover her rent. She worked with low-income mechs and femmes because she knew there were few members of the medical caste that would, yet this meant she made a lot fewer credits than most. She would be lucky to keep the lights on, and she would really have to cut corners when it came to energon consumption.

She had taken two orns off to allow her spark to recover from the severing, but she couldn't afford to lose any more time from work than she already had, so she returned and tried to keep her features schooled. Her apprentice Breakdown was there to greet her as always and she tried to give off an aura of calm authority, but he knew that something was wrong.

"It's nothing," Enamel had told Breakdown when he asked about it.

"Come on, Doc. If you don't tell me then how will I know what to look for in future patients that might have your condition?" Breakdown reasoned persistently.

"It's not a condition, Breakdown, it's just..." Enamel took a deep breath before she finally continued, "Bulkhead and I are severed, and my spark is still in recovery. I will be fine, but it will take time."

"Spark severing?" Breakdown asked incredulously, "Enamel! You shouldn't even be here! A severed spark requires at least 7 orns of berth rest! I'm taking you home."

"No, you can't!" Enamel shouted frantically, but then in a calmer voice said, "I need the money, and I need to keep myself busy. I don't want to spend all day in that quiet house thinking about him. I need to be here. Please understand."

"Yeah, I get it," Breakdown relented, "So, what's on today's lesson plan, Doc?"

"Well, our first patient won't arrive for another joor, so I believe we should continue with chapter 17 of your medical assistant training manual," Enamel replied; her mood improving already, "Let's see, chapter 17 is Deep Armor and Spark Scanning. Oh, _joy_."

"Is it that bad?" Breakdown asked apprehensively.

"It's a bit technical," Enamel admitted, "You will need to become familiar with the scanner's advanced settings. I will be your patient for this exercise. Now, have you studied the scanner's advanced settings?"

"Yes, ma'am," Breakdown nodded as he reached for the oversized device, "Yeesh, don't they make these things any smaller?"

"They do, but we can't afford the newer models," Enamel replied with a wry smile, "Now, do you know the setting for shoulder guard armor scanning?"

"Um...delta to the right, press the green button, and then turn the gamma knob until I hear a low humming noise?" Breakdown asked rather than stated.

"Correct," Enamel replied approvingly before laying down on the med berth, "Now demonstrate."

Breakdown fiddled with the controls of the scanner and pointed it toward Enamel's right shoulder.

"How does it feel?" Breakdown asked.

"I feel nothing," Enamel replied, "That is good. Now, do you see the scan?"

"Yeah," Breakdown replied.

"Can you read it?" Enamel asked.

"Yeah," Breakdown replied, "It says your shoulder guards are undamaged and your joints are up to date on lubrication and maintenance."

"Good," Enamel replied, "Now, do you know how to adjust for a spark scan?"

"Uh...delta to the left, push the green and red buttons at the same time, wait for a blinking light, and...gamma turned off?" Breakdown asked rather than stated.

"That is exactly right," Enamel replied proudly, "Now demonstrate."

Breakdown wasn't as confident with the spark scanning option. He knew if he did this wrong it could do some damage, especially since his instructor was already dealing with a weakened spark. He steeled himself and set the scanner to the correct settings. He then pointed it at Enamel's spark.

"Do you feel anything?" Breakdown asked nervously.

"Um...I feel movement," Enamel replied warily, "The setting might be slightly too high. It shouldn't interfere with the readings, however. What does the scanner say?"

"Um, let's see...It says...Oh, that can't be right," Breakdown muttered.

"What? What can't be right?" Enamel asked worriedly.

"Hm, according to these readings, you're carrying," Breakdown replied skeptically, "I must have set the scanner wrong."

"Let me see that," Enamel ordered and held her servos out for the scanner.

Breakdown obliged and handed her the cumbersome scanner. Enamel looked to make sure all of the dials and buttons were in their proper place, and then read the scan for herself. She did a double take just to make sure, and then she gently set down the scanner on the berth.

"Well Breakdown, I have good news," Enamel said with a cheeky smirk, "You're going to pass your medical exam."

"Holy pit! You're really _carrying_?" Breakdown exclaimed in awe.

"Yes, and I believe now would be a good time to discuss the prenatal spark scanner settings," Enamel replied without missing a beat.

"It's always business with you, huh?" Breakdown teased her, "Oh, alright. Let's see...I can't remember what chapter that's under."

"Chapter 21 of this data pad," Enamel replied, "Of course I can just show you. All you have to do to switch from regular scan to prenatal spark scan is to hold down this pink button next to the green one while you're scanning. Remember not to let go of the button until the scan is complete since scanning a newspark takes more time."

"Got it, Doc," Breakdown replied as he calibrated the settings, "Okay, now hold perfectly still and let me know if you start to feel overheated."

"That's what he said," Enamel quipped dryly.

It took a moment for Breakdown to realize she was joking, but when it finally registered Breakdown snorted in laughter and almost dropped his scanner, but quickly righted himself and began to take readings on Enamel's newspark. She waited for 5 breems while the scan was completed, and then Breakdown saved the scan results before turning off the machine.

"Well?" Enamel asked impatiently, "Is it healthy?"

"Yeah, he's healthy," Breakdown smiled warmly as he helped Enamel up off the berth.

"He? It's a mech?" Enamel asked hopefully, and Breakdown nodded, "Tell me everything. What is his alt mode? How far along am I? Is the coding for his color nanites completed yet?"

"Well let's see..." Breakdown pulled up the chart again, "Looks like he's gonna be a racer just like you. No nanites yet. Apparently you've only been carrying for 12 orns."

"Ah yes, of course. The carnival," Enamel sighed wistfully.

"Carnival?" Breakdown asked in confusion.

"12 orns ago Bulkhead surprised me with two tickets to a carnival in Vos," Enamel explained with a fond smile on her face plate, "Apparently Brawn owed him a favor and paid him back with some tickets he got from someone else. Bulkhead thought it would be a nice romantic getaway for a couple orns, and it certainly was. We stayed a cheap motel with the most adorable crystal sinks. The Vosian carnival was unlike anything I have ever seen. There were games, rides, and the most spectacular air show. Those sky performers were like living fireworks. Their bodies glowed, and their synchronized movements entranced. Bulkhead kissed me under the electrum archway, and when we got back to the motel we made love as if we were young again. That was the last good night we had together..."

"Bulkhead doesn't deserve you," Breakdown snapped when he realized she had started to cry, "You're a kind generous person that goes out of her way to help others. Just forget about Bulkhead. You don't need him."

"I wish that were true," Enamel replied morosely, "But the truth is I deserved what I got from him, and I _do_ need him. I have trouble simply supporting myself. How will I take care of a youngling? My family hasn't spoken to me in deca-vorns, and now my only support system is gone. This is the greatest orn of my life, and yet it is the worst orn of my life. What do I do?"

"Aw, come on, Doc. You'll pull through this," Breakdown soothed her as he put an arm around her shoulders, "Maybe you could move out of that house you and Bulkhead lived in and find someplace cheaper."

"There is nothing cheaper in Iacon," Enamel replied miserably, "I could try moving back to Tyger Pax, but my medical practice is here, and my patients rely on me. Oh, I do apologize for forcing my problems onto you, Breakdown. Please, just tell me when my first patient of the orn arrives. I'll wash my equipment while I have the time."

"Um, are you sure you're gonna be okay?" Breakdown asked in concern.

"I'll be fine," Enamel replied unconvincingly, "Soon I will have a son, and whatever it takes I will see to it that he has everything he needs."

Breakdown was still worried about his boss, but he knew there was no point in arguing with her; not when her spark was weakened and trying to support a new life. Part of him feared she would lose the newspark, but she didn't seem to share that concern. At the very least she didn't say anything about it.

When Breakdown was out of the room Enamel tried to contact Bulkhead over the comm system. It took a few seconds but then-

/Who is it?/ Bulkhead asked once he answered the frequency.

/Bulkhead, it's Enamel,/ Enamel informed him.

 _Kzzt_.

Enamel stood there for a moment dumbfounded as she realized what had just happened. That pile of slag had hung up on her! Well, this news was important. Bulkhead was going to be a father, and whether or not he would come back he still had a right to know.

/Hello?/ Bulkhead answered.

/Bulkhead, this is important!/ Enamel shouted quickly.

 _Kzzt_.

"Oh, come on..." Enamel growled as she rubbed her servo over her face plate in frustration. One more try.

/Bulkhead you're going to be a si-/

 _Kzzt_.

Enamel exhaled a sharp gust of air. Well, if Bulkhead couldn't be bothered to learn about his own son then fine! She would do this on her own, and he could rot in the pit for all she cared.


	8. Burning Bridges

_Author's Notes: I didn't realize this until I looked at my outline, but after this I only have a couple chapters left to go on this story. I've been looking forward to writing this chapter for a long time since it's the beginning of an exciting climax, but at the same time I'm not sure how well I did conveying what I wanted. Eh, it still turned out okay, and the next chapter will probably be even better...Hopefully. Anyway, thank you so much for reading this story, and I hope you guys enjoy this chapter of "Can't Look Back" :)_

* * *

Chapter 8

Burning Bridges

 **The Present**

Breakdown couldn't get it out of his processor. The events of the previous day replayed in his mind on loop. Even as he buffed Knockout's spinal struts and waxed his tires all he could think about was _her_.

How could Enamel still be alive? Nothing about any of this made sense, and seeing her with the Autobots aiding Bulkhead was even more infuriating. She should've been _his_ all those vorns ago! Bulkhead was the one that left her, and Breakdown was the one that stayed and supported her through her time of crisis. If she had never rejected him then he would've never had a reason to turn her in to that Decepticon prison ship. Now she was back...back with Bulkhead.

Breakdown hated Bulkhead with every fiber of his being, that much he knew. There were a lot of contributing factors to the end of their friendship, the most important of which being Bulkhead joining the Autobots instead of the righteous Decepticon cause. Megatron's rhetoric was that of liberation, while the Prime's was yet another attempt at maintaining unity among the castes. _Till all are one_...that phrase always infuriated Breakdown.

As much as he hated to admit it even in his own spark, Breakdown had to come to terms with the fact that the Decepticons were not the only reason he hated Bulkhead. He could still recall the desperation his former mentor felt as she struggled to pay bills, lost her home when she had to take time off work to raise the sparkling, and the stigma that came with not naming the sire on her child's birth records.

She had stated that as a mixed caste youngling her son would never fit in, but if he were perceived as of the same caste as her then he could have a chance at a real life.

When she moved to the same apartment complex as Breakdown it was the happiest orn of his life, but soon it all came crashing down when he was arrested for practicing medicine. He spent 100 vorns in that prison camp, and would've rotted there for the rest of his life if it wasn't for the Decepticons freeing the prisoners from their oppressors. He wouldn't see Enamel again until _that day._..

"Ow! Breakdown, be careful!" Knockout interrupted his train of thought, "Seriously, you nearly broke one of my neck cables!"

"Sorry, Doc," Breakdown replied apologetically.

"What's gotten into you?" Knockout asked, "Normally you're so careful. Is something wrong?"

"No. Just thinking," Breakdown shrugged it off.

"Well stop it. Too much thinking isn't good for you," Knockout snarked, "I think that's good enough for now. I'm going back to work. You coming?"

"Uh, yeah. In a klik, Doc," Breakdown replied with fake levity.

Breakdown sighed in relief once Knockout went back to work. This was getting out of hand. Now thoughts of Enamel were interfering with his job. He had to do something! Him not being able to have Enamel was one thing, but allowing Bulkhead to get back together with her after everything he'd done? That was unacceptable! He would have to find some way to get rid of Bulkhead once and for all.

That was when an idea began to form. Bulkhead now had not one, but _two_ weak spots. Breakdown could force Bulkhead to come to him, and then he could crush that overgrown wrecking ball like a tin can.

* * *

For the next couple weeks the Autobot base seemed to fall into a comfortable routine. Enamel found her place working alongside Ratchet and learning how to use the human computer system they were stuck with. Bulkhead and Enamel weren't exactly friends, but they no longer expressed animosity toward each other.

Bulkhead was glad that he and his ex had finally come to an understanding, but he noticed that Miko was avoiding the red femme whenever she could. Enamel was good at pretending this didn't bother her, but Bulkhead knew Enamel had grown to like the teenager. He felt bad about the unspoken animosity between Miko and Enamel, and he wanted to do something to help them get over it.

Bulkhead found Miko under the stairs leading to the platform sitting on the ground and tuning her guitar.

"Hey, Miko," Bulkhead greeted her in a friendly tone of voice.

Miko immediately perked up when she saw Bulkhead looming over her and smiling down at her.

"Hey, Bulk!" Miko replied jovially, "You wanna hear my new song? It's called _Oceans of Energon_. It's about when you tore those ten Vehicons apart during that fight a few months ago."

"Sounds great," Bulkhead said as he sat down next to her, "I've never had a song written about me before. Well, I take that back. Seaspray wrote a drinking song about me once, but it wasn't very flattering."

"Seaspray?" Miko asked.

"Yeah, Seaspray was a Wrecker during the good old days when it was just us verses the 'Cons on Cybertron," Bulkhead recalled fondly, "He wrote a song about how much fuel I guzzled after a fight. Ol' Barnacle Butt sure did love his sea shanties. To be fair though Wheeljack got him back for that one."

"What did he do?" Miko asked conspiratorially.

"He sanded down Seaspray's paint in his recharge," Bulkhead snickered; keeping his tone low in case anyone else was listening, "When he woke up he found out he was the same dull grey color as Starscream!"

Miko laughed out loud at the description, and Bulkhead allowed himself a good chuckle at the memory. It seemed like yesterday, yet it seemed like forever ago. It was closer to the latter.

"Listen Miko, what I really came here to talk to you about is Enamel," Bulkhead told her once the laughter died down.

"Oh yeah, what'd she do _this_ time?" Miko asked bitingly as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Miko, you can't keep this grudge forever," Bulkhead chided.

"Why not? She's a self-serving skank," Miko argued, "Besides, she obviously hates being here. She barely talks to anyone, even Ratchet. It's like being around my teachers all day when she's around. Why should I hang out with her?"

"I'm not saying you two should be best friends," Bulkhead replied placatingly, "But she's still a member of Team Prime, and I think she could use a friend right now."

"Then let her hang out with Raf," Miko huffed, "She's a science geek, he's a science geek. It works."

"Raf's a good kid, but you know more about how the world works than he does," Bulkhead replied, "Just give her one more chance Miko. For me?"

Miko looked up at those tiny cyan optics and that hopeful smile, and she sighed sharply in futile protest. There was no way she could resist Bulkhead when he gave her that puppy dog look.

"Argh, _fine_! I'll do something with Enamel," Miko finally agreed, "But if she makes one snide comment I'm walking home!"

"That's my girl," Bulkhead replied warmly as he wrapped one of his large fingers around her to hug her.

Miko didn't like the idea of spending any amount of time with Enamel, but she knew this was important to Bulkhead. Besides, if Miko kept her busy then maybe Enamel wouldn't have enough time to ruin Bulkhead's life.

Miko found the medic at her usual station calibrating equipment and testing cubes designed to deliver intravenous fluids to mechs that were incapacitated.

"Hey, Enamel," Miko called up to the busy femme.

Enamel looked down at Miko, and smiled a disarming smile that almost made Miko want to turn around and leave.

"Do you need something, youngling?" Enamel asked kindly.

"Um, I was just thinking, if you've got time, maybe we could do something," Miko shrugged; hoping Enamel would refuse so she could get back to comfortably hating the femme.

"I always have enjoyed the social scene," Enamel replied as she wiped her clean servos with a rag.

 _What a germaphobe..._ Miko thought derisively.

"Perhaps we could look up concert schedules online," Enamel suggested; piquing Miko's interest, "I don't know much about earth music, but I've found that keeping an open mind can lead to some remarkable experiences. You find something obscure and open, and we'll take the ground bridge to wherever we need to go."

"Um, okay," Miko replied, unsure how to react to what seemed like a great idea from such an unlikely source.

Miko searched for a half hour before she found something that still had tickets available for that night. It was some random folk group in California, and Miko almost decided to skip it since it wasn't metal. Then again, Enamel did say keeping an open mind could be good, so after a few moments to think about it Miko purchased the cheap tickets online and told Enamel they would need to be there by 8:00 pm.

* * *

The concert had been more fun than Miko would've thought. It was an outdoor concert with lots of stands for snacks, merchandise and T-shirts. Enamel stayed in the parking lot in her alt mode while Miko explored, and was likewise able to hear the soft melodic music wafting from the stage.

Enamel remembered the last time she went to a concert. It had been with Bulkhead on Cybertron, and the music there had been much more forceful than this human music. She remembered they got dirty in the sludge-covered grounder tracks, the highest seats where the seekers were glowed with neon lights and mechs holding glow sticks, and Bulkhead had taken her to a jeweler's booth where she got some gold piping welded onto her scruff bar. It had been a exhausting but exhilarating night.

Miko came racing back to the red Buick with bags full of merch and a wide grin splitting her face. It was 12:30 am, and the concert had not been over long.

"You wouldn't believe this one joker in the front row!" Miko laughed as she slid into the passenger's seat, "He threw a veggie burger on stage and shouted 'Side effects may vary!'. _Whew_ , that was great. Were you bored just sitting here all night?"

"Not really," Enamel replied contentedly, "Your planet's music is intriguing."

"Ah, that was just the wimpy stuff," Miko waved away the comment, "You should hear Slash Monkey in concert! Now that's a real band."

"Perhaps we can go to one of their concerts sometime," Enamel suggested.

"Yeah, and we can bring Bulkhead with us!" Miko replied excitedly.

"Yes, I am sure he would enjoy that," Enamel agreed; not liking the idea but willing to go through with it for the sake of the youngling, "Would you mind if I drove for a while before we call for the ground bridge? I do enjoy the open road."

"Sure," Miko replied, "Can we go off-road?"

"We'll see," Enamel told her, "Wherever I can go fast, I'm satisfied."

Enamel pulled out of the lot and took off down the road. She wrapped her seatbelt around Miko to make sure she wouldn't get hurt when they got out onto the empty road and started going faster. The crowded roads soon gave way to forested curving roads. Enamel weaved through them gracefully, and Miko whooped in delight whenever Enamel would hug the edge to show off.

After a few minutes it started to rain, so Enamel was forced to show down. The curves soon gave way to straighter roads that had fewer trees around them. Enamel turned on her radio so Miko wouldn't be bored, and it started playing an old country song.

"Ew, turn it to something else!" Miko demanded as she made a disgusted face.

"Very well, Miko," Enamel replied agreeably.

She adjusted her dials until she found a swing channel, and Miko shouted that the song was likewise too old. Enamel tried again, and this time she found a jazz channel that sounded a lot like the swing channel to Enamel.

"Ugh! Is this road near a retirement home?" Miko groused, "Every station sounds like it was made for old people! Too bad Bulk didn't tell me the words to Seaspray's song."

"Who is Seaspray?" Enamel asked curiously.

"Eh, it's not important. Just turn the radio off," Miko replied defeatedly.

Enamel did as requested, and soon the surrounding area was filled with silence. Miko yawned, tired from their long night at the concert. The time was 1:45 am, and Enamel was grateful in that moment that Miko's host parents thought she was at a sleepover. In a way she kind of was, since she would be sleeping over at the Autobot base. She only hoped that the humans' couch was clean. For small creatures they certainly made big messes.

Miko soon fell asleep, and Enamel tried to drive more carefully so she wouldn't disturb the recharging sparkling. Enamel was glad Miko finally forgave her. She loved the human children and was especially fond of Miko since she was so close with Bulkhead. It was like having a sparkling of her own again.

Enamel suddenly lurched when she saw the ground bridge appear in front of her. She didn't call for Ratchet or even give away her location, so she knew that bridge wasn't from the Autobots.

"Uh...What's going on?" Miko asked groggily as she tried to stir herself awake.

Enamel saw Breakdown coming through the ground bridge, and he had his hammers out and a wicked grin on his face plate. She knew then that this was an ambush, and she had to get Miko to safety!

Turning around with a screech, Enamel drove away from Breakdown. Breakdown then proceeded to transform into his alt mode and pursue.

"Call the others!" Miko shouted as she looked behind them at Breakdown getting closer.

Enamel tried the comm system, but all she got was static.

"The signal is jammed," Enamel replied hurriedly, "Hang on tight, Miko!"

Breakdown was stronger than Enamel, that much was true, but she knew she was faster than the hulking brute. She forced as much of her fuel reserves as she could to get away from the jamming frequency and her pursuer, but soon she had to slow down when the curves showed back up. She maintained as much of her speed as she could, but these roads were unfamiliar to her and she didn't want to damage Miko. Breakdown used this opportunity to drive up next to Enamel and ram into her side! Enamel transformed before she hit the side of the mountain, and she gently tossed Miko into some brush to keep the girl safe. Breakdown transformed and stalked toward Enamel, and Enamel looked back at him with a mixture of shock and anger.

"You...You struck me!" Enamel exclaimed in outrage.

"Yeah, and if you don't come quietly I'll do it again," Breakdown bluntly replied.

"You want to attack me? Fine, then prepare to see your own fuselage, you uncouth barbarian!" Enamel roared as she charged toward the much larger mech with her tiny scalpels and drills replacing her digits.

Breakdown dodged Enamel's impromptu attack and dove into the brush where he found Miko, who was still watching what transpired without leaving Enamel's side. He quickly grabbed the girl, and Miko yelped as she was lifted up into the air by his massive servo.

Enamel was about to attack again, but stopped when Breakdown held up his prize in one servo and held the hammer servo over the human's head as a warning.

"Now, let's try this again," Breakdown said in an eerily calm tone of voice, "Surrender to me or I kill Bulkhead's pet. Considering what that big green slagger means to you, I'd say you don't want that to happen."

Enamel looked torn between dissecting Breakdown, running for her own life, or trying to grab Miko. Finally however, she hung her helm and approached Breakdown; her body language telling Breakdown that he had won.

Breakdown ordered the Vehicon on duty to send him another ground bridge, and he returned to the Nemesis with two new captives.

* * *

It was 6:00 am when Bulkhead onlined. He had a lot of work to do for the day. First he had to patrol the area looking for Decepticon activity, then he had to help Bumblebee refine energon crystals into a usable liquid, and after that Optimus Prime and Fowler were going to give them all a report from the US government. It was going to be a busy day, and earth days were so short. He only hoped he got everything done. He also wanted to make sure to say goodbye to Miko, who had stayed the night with them so she could go to a concert with Enamel.

Bulkhead entered the main area to see Ratchet at the computer console as always. It seemed like the old medic never recharged. He looked for Miko on the couch, but she wasn't there. The blankets hadn't even been messed with. That seemed very odd to Bulkhead.

"Hey Ratchet, where's Miko?" Bulkhead asked.

"Miko and Enamel haven't come back yet," Ratchet informed the Wrecker, "I don't know how long human concerts last, but this seems like a long time to listen to music and scarf down snacks."

"They never came home?" Bulkhead asked; the worry in his tanks growing, /Enamel, where are you? Enamel! Answer me! Where's Miko?/

"Well?" Ratchet asked when he saw Bulkhead was on his comm.

"Nothing," Bulkhead replied soberly, "Something's wrong. Enamel isn't this irresponsible, and Miko would've called me by now. Where are they?"

A few minutes later Bulkhead got his answer when an embedded message came in on a high frequency on their computer. Ratchet was in the storage room, so Bulkhead answered. It was a message addressed to him from Breakdown. It read:

 _Looking for someone? I have your femme and your pet. If you ever want to see them alive again, follow these coordinates to the Nemesis. Come alone and face me like a mech. Breakdown._

Bulkhead's energon boiled. Things were finally starting to look good for Bulkhead again, and Breakdown had to come along and threaten everything! Miko was Bulkhead's best friend, and one of the few people in his life that truly understood him. Enamel had been the love of his life and was the mother of the son that he never got a chance to meet. They both meant the world to him, and if Breakdown harmed either of them then there was no force in the world that could save him from Bulkhead's wrath.

* * *

 **The Past**

When Bulkhead joined the Autobot cause he had no idea that he would ever be considered Wrecker material but apparently his boss, an elderly soldier named Kup, saw potential in him. It was a great feeling. No one had ever seen true potential in Bulkhead before, and he wanted to do everything in his power to live up to the trust his teammates had in him.

Truth be told, joining the Autobots at all had been a tough call. After he moved to Nuon he got a job tearing down condemned buildings, and for the most part it was routine work. The pay wasn't great, and there were some nights he was lonely without Enamel, but for the most part it felt great just to be free.

Well, _free_ was a relative term. He quickly began to see that lines were being drawn in the sand between the oppressed underclass he belonged to and the privileged elite castes that kept them that way. This saw the Decepticon movement becoming more popular, and many of Bulkhead's coworkers wanted to join them.

Bulkhead wasn't convinced, however. It was true that he wanted change, but there was just something off about that gladiator Megatronus. He spoke of equality, but he also spoke about the strong dominating the weak and peace through tyranny. That didn't seem like a better system than what they had now. If anything it seemed worse, and Bulkhead found it frustrating that no one else Around him could see Megatronus for the scoundrel he was.

Things came to a head when the Matrix of Leadership, long thought lost, was recovered and selected the next Prime. It shook up everyone, because the new Prime wasn't a member of the ruling caste. He was a data clerk, a mere nobody! Furthermore, he was a vocal supporter of Megatronus! Against all odds the youngling Orion Pax had been reformatted as Optimus Prime.

Rather than bring peace, however, this news only escalated the conflict that was already bubbling over. Megatronus turned on Optimus and militarized the Decepticon resistance group; turning them from protesters to terrorists. Bulkhead's spark sank at the destruction the Decepticons committed in the name of their crazed extremist leader, and he wasn't going to stand by and watch it happen. That was when he decided to join the Autobots to stop that madmech from killing everyone.

As it turned out many Autobots weren't as strong as Bulkhead or as willing to get their servos dirty as he was. He was quickly promoted to the Wreckers, a group of Autobots that operated outside the typical confines of their faction.

He was accepted almost right away, and quickly made friends. Wheeljack was his best friend, and Brawn joined their group as well. He also liked Seaspray, Kup, Springer, and Firestar. They were strong, open, honest Cybertronians that Bulkhead knew he could trust with his life.

50 vorns later, and the missions became more intense, the stakes got higher, and the enemy's numbers grew. More and more Cybertronians joined the Decepticons out of fear of retaliation, though most that surrendered were culled anyway. Their next mission was the result of yet another surrender gone horribly wrong.

"They attacked a what!?" Bulkhead exclaimed when he got the mission statement.

"A foundling home," Kup reported; melancholy etched deep in his face plate, "They burned it to the ground. Reports say there are still Decepticons in the area, but there might also be survivors. There were 504 sparklings and 47 caretakers in that building. If even one of them survived then it's up to us to save them. I'm sending you and Jackie. Think you can handle it, Bulk?"

"You know it," Bulkhead replied confidently, though inside he knew this mission would scar him, "You can count on us."

When Bulkhead and Wheeljack made it to the site, it was even worse than they thought. For one thing, the buildings were still on fire. For another thing, they could hear the screams of victims even as the 'Cons continued to destroy them. They listened, and they could hear the cries of a femme being cut off by a loud pounding noise. That was where the Decepticons would be.

Bulkhead and Wheeljack ran in that direction but didn't give away their position yet. They slunk near the wrecked and flaming walls in hopes of catching the attacker by surprise. When they got there however, it was Bulkhead who was surprised by what he saw. The Decepticon killing the victims was his old friend and former coworker; Breakdown!

"Breakdown!" Bulkhead shouted before he realized what he was doing.

"Bulkhead, _shh_!" Wheeljack tried to reign in his friend, but it was too late; they had been spotted.

"Well well, look who it is!" Breakdown exclaimed as he spread his arms out wide; the hammers still in place, "Long time no see, Bulkhead. I see you wear the Autobot insignia now. Why am I not surprised?"

" _You_ did this!?" Bulkhead growled in anger and disbelief, "Breakdown, I know you're greedy and ambitious, but I never thought you'd stoop to killing sparklings and femmes just to make yourself feel big!"

"You have no idea what this is really about, do you?" Breakdown scoffed, "Of course not. You can't see the world beyond your own little bubble. This is a war to end the reign of rich spoiled mechs taking the money and credit for our hard work. We built this world Bulkhead, _us_ , the laborers. Megatron recognizes this, and Optimus Prime does not! What does some data clerk know of our struggles? Of our pain? I hate you, but I'm a fair mech, so I'll give you a choice. Join the Decepticons and take your place in history, or die here and now as a traitorous Autobot."

Bulkhead didn't care about Breakdown's speech. He was too busy looking at the crumpled body of the dead femme at Breakdown's pedes. He had also seen the bodies of sparklings, mechs, and femmes littered throughout this burning rubble. He knew that Breakdown was responsible for this, and Bulkhead also knew he could never forgive him for that.

With a mighty roar Bulkhead charged at Breakdown and collided with him, but Breakdown was sturdy enough to block him. Wrecking ball came against hammer as the two pushed each other in an effort to gain the upper hand.

"You always were soft, Bulkhead," Breakdown grunted as he struggled to stay upright, "Oh, and by the way, I took _real_ good care of Enamel when you left."

That was the final straw. Bulkhead heaved once more with great force, and managed to topple Breakdown over and pin him to the ground with his pede. Breakdown struggled, and Bulkhead prepared to smash his helm in for his crimes against the Cybertronian species, but then a horde of Vehicon troops came rushing in, and Bulkhead had to fight them off. He managed to get away, but so did Breakdown.

Bulkhead met back up with Wheeljack a joor and a half later. Wheeljack had managed to recover 5 surviving sparklings and 1 caretaker from the foundling home, so Bulkhead at least knew their mission wasn't for nothing. It was a historic moment for Bulkhead as well, because it was the beginning of a rivalry that would last for millennia.


End file.
